Last night as I was doing the scroll laying in bed I happened apon an excerpt that I couldn’t believe was even out there. The passage was talking about the number one reason why marriages fail is because women fail to be obedient to their husbands. Obedient? That is the number one reason marriages fail? In this day and age that is the best they come up with. They say the bible is filled with these types of arguments between woman and man. To me laying the whole failure of marriage down to just the woman in this day and age is absurd.
Let me tell you why I think marriages fail….
We live in a time where anything, anybody, every desire must be indulged. Society has taught us that life is too short. We must have a vast well of “things” to brag about. Our houses, lifestyle and relationships are constantly being scrutinized. Media has made it that we all line up for the newest technology that we all desire to be clothed in the newest fasion that as long as is all on display for the world to display we must be doing something right. We can find a new partner of any shape or size to indulge us in any given moment. In fact it seems multiple partners are encouraged as long as we are made aware of it before the actual act is even a thought. To me it seems that it is alot easier to look for somebody new on the ever expanding world wide web. There are apps for every type of fetish you have out there. We have made the world a socially acceptable place for everybody to live the world as it makes them happiest. This is why marriages fail. We stop connecting on an intimate level with our spouse. Our spouse was supposed to be our partner in life. The greatest gift is watching your family grow, not having the latest arm candy of the moment. Life is meant to be lived, explored, loved. And like most mamals we live in a pack, that pack is our family. Together facing whatever the world has to throw at you as together you are only has strong as your weakest link and together the world doesn’t feel scarey. We are free to explore and discover ourselves in a safe space because we know we have the ultimate gift and that is family surrounded by love.
It went on to talk about how the man expects that a wife does certain things. That to me is absolute trash. Me and my husband are a partnership. He does help around the house but it is really not expected or encouraged. My husband works full time in a very demanding, physical job. Our decision for me to leave my job was a mutual decision that we knew would benefit our family in the long run. I like to think of my “job” (if one needs to have a title) as the best job on Earth ❤ My days are filled with teaching and playing with my son. I am getting him prepared for the man that I know he is destined to become. I get to live with so many animals and I am surrounded by alot of my favourtie trinkets. My husband indulges every zany idea I have. I have a giant makeup/dressing closet, I have a space for my esthetics and I even have a lil office cubby space just off the kitchen. I am free to cook and bake whatever I like to provide nutrition for my family. The house I like to keep as clean as one can with a 17 month old and a small zoo running around. I am free to interact with my neighbors, my community and my environment in any way that I can. In the Spring I look forward to gardening and trying my luck at growing Roses. Not any of those things that I mentioned means I am obedient to my husband. It means I am active and present in my life. The definiton of mom is as follows: "A mother is a protector, disciplinarian and friend. A mother is a selfless, loving human who must sacrifice many of their wants and needs for the wants and needs of their children. A mother works hard to make sure their child is equipped with the knowledge, skills and abilities to make it as a competent human being." A mother is a child's first teacher so taking the time to ensure these skills are acquired is the best gift. That is my job right now. Everything else that I do on a day to day basis is out of pride. We all feel better when we live in a clean space. I make it a game everyday to see if I can somehow get all 3 levels clean. The answer is usually a no but sometimes you can get enough done in one day that it seems like a possibility for tomorrow. I like to live the life that I was born to live and taking pride in my living space is important. The key is that if both partners are on the same page with their expectations then the rest comes easy.
Sitting at home one can get distracted but I keep my days filled with all of the above mentioned as well as reading for knowledge, watching important documentaries to gain more insight on animal behaviours and development, writing down my thoughts (as I am doing right now) and fundraising. Once we all gravitate towards the life that we were meant to live you will see that your pathway seems to light out. Life will never be perfect and marriage will never be easy we have accessibility to immediate gratification for that. My fear is maybe we will all end up as singles in retirement homes. Just imagine how much tinder will change in that time and how much more removed and desensitized from our own lives we become as we allow social media to take over our time. So now I ask the question who really is obedient here? Isn’t it all of us who has become obedient and a slave to social media?