How many times have we dreamed of a different life but unsure what that path looks like? Maybe we have just become to complacent in our ways that we accept the hand that we have been dealt and move on. I have always been that one that thought the Universe would just give to me what it will. I was humble and gracious with every blessing that has come my way. I thought being appreciative with good intentions would be enough to keep the good luck flowing. Or maybe it was because our definition of success was defined by the limitations opposed onto us by others. We do not have to be defined by our failures but we can use those failures to define who we are. The best tool we have in our ability to succeed is our perserverance. There will always be another way to achieve your goal. You don’t have to accept the way it is but you have to be ready to learn the lesson that is laid out to you.
A prime example would be the Pageant I particpated in this summer in Vancouver. My preparation came to finding the perfect outfit and deciding on accessories and nothing more. We travelled 14 hours with my family (that was a lesson in myself, I am trying to teach myself how to get along with my husband in times of stress) and attended the activities that surrounded the weekend leading up to the show. Needless to say I did not place. Of course like anybody there will always be dissappointment. On the ride home I began to realize that the way I presented myself on stage wasn’t a package that showcased pride, determination and success. My routin was wobbly (I may have tripped on my heels). Where so many others would faulter and beat themselves up I took a different road. I decided that when it comes to these competition I needed to find a way to bring a better package not only for the judges but for myself to proud of the character I was trying to get the World to buy in on.
Now my prep for the Vernon show was completely different. Just like anything that we want to perfect in our lives you need to research, practice and more practice. We all get to submit our biographies to the pageant co-ordinator almost as soon as we are registered in the pageant. With that information in hand I decided not only to research and study what great Pin-Up competitors bring to stage I would practice. I ran that speech in my head that I could recite it offhand. I practiced in my shoes, out of my shoes, with the speech out of the speech. I would look at myself in front of the mirror and look to see what the judges and crowd were seeing to try and bring a better overall package to stage. The way we define winning is also something that we need to redefine. I decided that all I wanted to do in order to achieve success was to bring a better package on show day then I did previously. To me that is winning. I can not say that I am more worthy than any other competitor. It wouldn’t be a competition then. To be able to cheer and watch other women take the stage and showcase their uniqueness is an unforgettable feeling. Pageants will always hold a special place in my heart. They were the gateway into the Pin-Up lifestyle and it is something I hope to participate in for year into the future. I found something that I love that helps me radiate to the World that I am a strong, fearless woman ready to take on whatever the World throws at her.
I am at a very lucky time in my life. I have worked very hard in becoming somebody that I am proud of. The direction that I was being pushed into wasn’t always well lit up. There was some very dark periods where most of my days were spent alone with very little interaction. Even with that imagery that moment in time allowed me the opportunity to rediscover who I wanted to be with very little background noise to deter me. Through all my readings it is hard to determine if we do better alone or with somebody by our side. I do believe that at times there are safety in numbers but I also wonder if those numbers will also influence the outcome of what we are trying to achieve. Being able to control the outside noise that comes with living such a boisturous character is something that has to be perfected. It is true that in order to achieve greatness you have to be willing to put in the work and you have to be able to tune out the background noise. Being able to stay at home during such an important time in my sons life has allowed us both to grow immensely. In the quiet times when my son is fast asleep I can work on myself and see if investing into my character will return the results that I have been anxiously awaiting my whole life for but too intimadated to take that leap of faith.
For the first time in my life I have been able to reflect back on moments that have taught me some of the greatest lessons. Like losing my first job at Subways. It may have lasted only two weeks when I was 15 but it taught me the importance of not compromising who you are. My manager wanted me to slap together these inedible sandwiches in order to get through the line. I do not know about you but a sandwich that immediately falls into your lap is not appealing and only provides more frustration for everybody involved. Why call somebody an artist then right? Needless to say at that age I just let it roll off my back and moved on to the next job. Every interaction and hurdle that we overcome actually help define who we are. It is the craziest feeling when you remember events that have happened previous only to uncover the message that was being relayed to you in the first place.
Another prime example is I am in an online Pin-Up of the month contest with the Pin-Up Registry. There is 14 girls from all over the World vying for a feature of their website. When it was first announced that I made the top 14 I was of course announced last. Like any true competitor I took a look at where all the other girls were. It was based on likes. Some of the girls already had a 100 and I was just barely getting started. Where most girls would have already admitted defeat I saw it in another way. Trying to figure out how I can get myself into the came I took an active role in trying to determine my outcome. We are all committed to doing the basics. Sharing on our Facebook and inviting our friends to get involved. I am pretty sure most of my friends have turned off my newsfeed because when I am passionate about something I tend to get a little annoying lol After all that was said in done and all the friends that I could ask have liked the picture I took a look and I was only in 3rd. Not willing to admit defeat as I know believe this to be another stepping stone in my journey of life. It is crazy what one can accomplishment when they put their hard in soul into something. When you truly believe in yourself you will find a way to move mountains. There is always another way. Determined I began to reach out to groups and the media of facebook platforms that I knew had the ability to reach far more people then I could ever dream. There was alot of rejection and alot of no answers but guess what!! I got a mention on a page. All that hard work of sending out and tagging EVERYBODY I finally got a little help. As I went to my violin practice I had no service till I got home. Not wanting to check where I stood I waited a half hour or so. Can you believe that I am in the lead!!! I couldn’t! I was trailing by 100 votes and I had no idea how I would ever make the difference but here I was with more than 100 votes in the lead. Even with a comfortable lead I can’t slow down because just like I did you can’t count out the work of somebody who is determined. That is why you always have to give everything you are doing 110%. You also have to believe in yourself 110%. I believe in myself and my ability to win this contest that I have invested the time and work into making that dream into a reality.
Even if by 5pm on Sunday I lose the lead I learned so much about myself. I learned that when it comes to things that matter I will not be stopped. I will find a way to get my message in front of those that need to hear it. Rome was not built in a day so how can the storey of my life be told in one short paragraphy. You really only do get what you put into something. The hand outs of life were already given out so if you missed yours chances are you are going to have to work hard to get it. A determined invididual will always find a way to come out on top. In fact they will redefine what success means to them in order to achieve it. We may not all be destined to live lives that impact the World but we can definetly impact those in our immediate vicinity. The mind is a very powerful tool. It does help us maintain our drive in periods of despair. There will be no reward without being able to overcome diversity. That has been proven. The Universe likes to test you and your abilities to handle lifes greatest gifts. Those gifts will only be revealed to you only after you have shown the World your ability to do great things with that gift. There is no sense in having the power to change the World unless in fact you plan on using it. Our ability to adapt to the flows and ebs that frequent our days is a vital skill that we all most fine tune. There will always be dark clouds but our ability to line them with silver will be the telling point if we are successful or not. Some of the greatest leaders of our time have perfected this skill. Never allow the World to see you at your weakest as they will use that against you. We all feel these emotions of great sadness. We also have all been around somebody that allows us the opportunity to dwell in our sorrows. They encourage us to partake in vices that will lower our self worth. They make the sad periods feel longer and only prolong the inevitable. In the same sense a friend that encourages you to smile and look for the positive will help you heal a great deal faster. There is no right or wrong way in which to live there is only your way. My hope is that your direction will help find you down a path of self discovery thus improving your self worth and your mental fortitude. You are worth the hard work it takes to achieve the best results.
“Sometimes the slightest things change the directions of our lives, the merest breath of a circumstance, a random moment that connects like a meteorite striking the earth. Lives have swiveled and changed direction on the strength of a chance remark.”