So many of us are quick to sell ourselves short. Determined to live out somebody else’s life. Too scared of our own image because it is in our own image that we can see the error of our eyes. Laying awake a night we question the path that we are on. To powerless to redirect the course. If only we could had enough courage and faith to believe in ourselves. That the image that we are today is perfect amongst our imperfections allowing us the opportunity for continuous growth and fortitude. It isn’t enough to honour those that have decided to dictate our futures. What we need is a way to honour ourselvses as we strive to live a life more interesting. More interesting in the sense that it doesn’t conform to the masses. Just interesting enough so when your head hits the pillow you can sigh out in a deep melodic exhaustion as you await for the promise of another day.I know all to well the power of addiction, the fear of living alone and the embarassment of failing. What we need to be addicted to is living our lives, we need to fear living amongst bad company and we should only be embarassed over the chances we never take. What motivates me to get out of bed is to make the World, our world a better place. We all have these incredible opportunities to make a difference yet we are too afraid to be ridiculed and shunned by the people and communities we love. We would rather blend into the crowd then take a step forward. But forward is the perpetual push destined for all of us. We can never go backwards in time. Living in the past only brings fear and anxiety. Living in the future will ultimately end in the same results as well. What we have is an opportunity to live in the present and allow the Universe to unfold in the manner that it may.We are all so excited to change what has already happened. We saw that in the way we took down the statue of John A. MacDonald (one of Canada’s forefathers). Yes he was a racist and probably a bigot but who cares. It wasn’t part of our time yes it was our history but why does it have to dictate so much of who we are in the present. Now to touch on slavery if only for a minute. The longer we allow this grip to take a hold of us the longer it will take to heal from allt hose transgressions. If we believe what was happening was right then you are at fault. Trying to make the World a better place, an equal place is where we need to work towards. I may be a piece of my ancestors but I am a very small piece. Unless a stay stagnant in my life I am free to evolve and metamorphize into a being that can do more harm then good.That is something that isn’t really talked about to much. We are taught that dreams aren’t meant to be having. That if we stick to the course that was set out for us that we will achieve succcess. Who determines how success is defined for you. We have dissected everything down to its most literal sense and try to suppress any individuality. Case and point anybody who doesn’t conform to the traiditional sense of what it means to be alive. There is no way imagineable that we can determine or even understand each individual being. That is why there is so much conflict and discontent in the World. There are dictators who instill fear into those that follow them. Where would you turn what would you do? If your whole country was being torn apart by war and poverty wouldn’t you tend to believe those that are living the life right there with you. Instead of your neighbours to the west who only intervene when it seems most convenient for them.Where is the compassion? Where is the Heart? All of these questions have led me to the manifestation of my own dreams. My happiness is tied directly to all those that I get to find myself in the company of. There is this simplistic beauty when you are in the presence of another being. A beautiful harmony exists amongst the two when there is no need for words. You can tell when somebody is receptive to your existence byt he warm energy that passes between the two. Like an invisible hug there presence in the warm fills you with such honesty and hope. I leave my heart open not because I like pain because of the fear of missing a connection with somebody who needs it. That is my dream to be an open heart for those who need. The greatest pain I have experienced so far is being by a mother’s side who has just lost her child. No loss on Earth can ever compare to the feeling of never being able to talk to that small piece of you that existed for a small fraction in time. My dream now has evolved to try and minimize this amount of pain that one feels in the heart.The loss of a child brings on unimagenable grief. I see a disconnect with those that may be fighting an addiction or mental illness with that of a grieving parent. In the New Year my goal is to bridge this gap between the two. Speaking from a place of darkness and addiction the person you are most embarassed of is yourself. You draw in to scared to reach out because you don’t want the people you know how much you failed. Nobody wants to have those expectations not only imposed apon themselves but their loved ones. It is better in their eyes to turn a blind eye and ignore the situation spiralling deeper out of control. Or maybe would it feel better to put pen and paper and get thoe feelings out. What if you could send those thought to an impartial party who could give you guidance or even some hope and guidance to see value in yourself once again. Suicide and mental illness are on the rise and it is affecting people of all ages. With my training in suicide awareness and my compassion for people I hope to get a P.O. Box set up for letters. I also hope to talk to our youth in our school system if I can find a way. I have struggle for years trying to find the defintion of life. So far what I have uncovered is the defintion of life is differently for all of us. It is only through the continuous hope and dreams that we will be able to achieve our own successful defintion. Coming from a place of love and where my dreams are never achieved but manifest into new ones. I hope to make your journey’s a little less painful by making you all a part of my dreams.