Eyes Sealed Shut

You don’t have to know the World to know that the World is badly damaged. You can see it threaded into the fine details of everything we do. There is rarely a time where we come together in praise because all too often we are mourning the loss of civilization as we cme to terms with just how much a human heart can handle. It is like we are constantly flirting with th enemy to see just what lays around the other side. I learned long ago that life isn’t about rainbow and butterflies. That it becomes quite painful. To others it becomes so powerful that you become nothing but dust waiting, hoping and praying that the end will come to you outside of your own hands.

Today one of the first stories I read was about a woman who had to learn how to survive in a World that failed her miserably. Where once Christmas brought her so much joy she is forced to live out the nightmare that was brought down to her at the ends of her estranged spouse. Imagine hating another human being so much, I mean I can’t even comprehend this level of hate.  It is hard to imagine that his actions were the result of his hatred to his ex wife. I mean these were his innocent children. They looked up to him without fear and unconditional love. Without hesitation he ended their poor lives on Christmas Day just to cause his ex extreme pain. I will leave the link of the article in case you desire to read more (https://www.vicnews.com/news/victim-impact-statements-expected-tuesday-at-andrew-berrys-sentencing-hearing/).

How I wish that the World could see and value all life that surrounds us. That maybe in time we can enjoy each other for the unique gifts that have been bestowed apon us to make the World great again. We will never achieve this by our mass production of wants and needs. It is something that can never be given but absorbed. If you could hold love in your hands and give it to those that need it would be alot easier. There is no way to heal the holes that form on ones heart at the hands of others.  We have begun to hunt in these packs attacking the weak. What about we are only as strong as our weakest link? Do we really have to be that civilization that brings itself down apon its knees. Never happy, never satisified content to rip each other apart to shreds instead of show an ounce of compassion. Compassion is weakness and weakness is unforgiveable. Do you know how many times I got ridiculed for crying to much? Are how awful it feels to have all eyes turn to you in a crowded room because the energy of the room has turned somber. Waiting for you to make a scene to cry and shed tears for those that can no longer. Eyes wide open or eyes sealed shut.  To me it is all the same. We are blindly ignorant to the things that matter. And erected these pedestals for people we deem worthy enough for our attention.

Let’s control the things that we can in fact change and torment those who refuse to conform.  That is the World.  That is who we have become. In a World filled with inglorious entitled bastards we would rather follow the pack then to try and venture out alone. I have long come to realize that I would rather be all alone then left to hunt on the weak. What matters to me is the feelings of those that share this space in time with me. Their pain is my pain and in a World where social media rules how else can one try to reach the masses who have already been intoxicated with the scent of fear and blood. We victimize those that need us most. Come hell or high water the elitest will remain in taxt. Even when the bodies of their people swirl around their ankles. They would rather sit high atop their mountain then to come down witht he commoners to play.

Our World is sealed off from each other. The amount of pain that one has to endure in this life is insane. It is like preaching to a mute choir. Nobody has a clue what any of this means. What we know for damn sure is we definetly don’t get out of here alive so feed your friends to the wolves and come out leading the pack. That is human nature isn’t it? Survival of the fittest and all that jazz. It works in the wild but like uncivilized beasts we do not realize the power we actually have. Words of crumbled entire nations and our actions are resulting in some of the most horrific crimes against humanity but still we fear nothing. Or maybe it is te fear that is guiding us. One being. One single human being can’t be worth that much to you…can it? What if we all thought that way? The easiest life it seems is for the crimanlly insane. They never have to be accountable for their actions. They never have to know the pain that they have bestowed apon another human being. The most precious gift that we are ever given is life so how can it be that after taking one these eveil beasts are able to walk freely amongst us. I know, I know that talk is cheap. Words become indestructible forces of nature when there is action in it’s mist. What action can I take to help minimize the pain of loss that some feel when this is the case. We used to have strict laws where yes some people did die by mistake. That was a mistake an accident. Call it what you will. Wrong place at the wrong time. What is murder then the right place at the right time. Some people are capable of mind blowing acts of violence. I am not saying an eye for an eye. Or maybe I am. I don’t know. I am just tired of seeing the hurt that we still impose on each other. Like we are the almighty God and it is our hand that is worthy enough to punish.

Now more than ever there is a need for random acts of kindness, patient ears and warm hugs. So now more than ever I must gather all my strength. I must tell the World that is listening. I am here, there are more like me. All we care about is your health and well-being leave the rest up to me. I can’t heal the World but maybe just maybe for a second of your day when you think nobody is listening…well I am. For those that still love the good old fashion pen to paper I am working on getting my own PO Box (it’s kind of my Christmas Wish). For me I grew up with my letters to Grannie. There is no better feeling then opening up your mailbox to letters. So for those that need a more personal connection without meeting face to face. Well I am listening and I am working on that. I know it seems ridiculous and there is no way that what I am speaking is true. But trust me. My life changed forever the day my eyes got sealed shut. Like a gift to my soul it was like I was forgiven for all my mistakes. Like a beacon of hope I was brought into the light. Believe what you will but when I lay dying there something incredible happened. One minute as my blood pressure kept rising and the doctors screamed at my husband to make a choice. Me or our unborn son. The light that gripped over me released me and for one split second (more like 10) my blood pressure slowed enough for the Dr’s to save us both. Ask who you may. The 8 Dr’s in attendance, my husband, my sisters, my friends. To witness the miracle of life twice in one day you have to believe in something. That very thought that one second could have forever ended my life well…I seal all that I was before in the hopes for a brighter tomorrow. I was given a chance to see again. To see the love that we can share with each other. That within us we have the power to make a difference to somebody’s day. That given the choice between life and death you will choose to live with me versus the alternative. For whatever reason I stayed here on this side. So I have to make a difference. I have to make it count because if I don’t. Then the wrong life was spared that day and I can not live with myself thinking that. I will reach for the stars and I will take you all with me because it is only with love that my eyes began to open again.

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