Life is painful at times. Sometimes it’s bittersweet. We spend as much time holding our breaths as we do with moments that take our breath away.  We are all these misguided lil shells of who we should be. Time has become our enemy as we race against the clock. Instead of praise should be we hear ridicule. Too many of us hide in the shadows afraid to voice what lays in our head. Dancing with our imperfections we find ways to at least feel normal. At least we hope that is what normal feels like but how can we know for sure when we spent our whole lives living somebody else’s life. How far do we have to stray before we open our eyes and get back on course. What would it take for you to step out of the darkness and find the strength to make your way. What could you do today to turn your World for the better. I have outlined some steps I have adopted into my life that has seemed to help release some of the built up negative energy in my life.

1. Participate. The first thing you can do to start enjoying your life is to participate in living in it.  It is more than just getting out of bed in the morning. It is about getting up out of bed with contention every time your feet hit the floor. Every morning is a new day a new chance to discover something new. It doesn’t haven’t to be Earth shattering just something that causes the life inside of you to sir. Be fully aware of your surroundings the colours, the smells the energies.  Take it all in like you are living on borrowed time. We are in fact living like an inmate on death row. What makes us different is they now it is coming. They wait with nervous anticipation for that day. Knowing it’s coming but confined to four walls they can’t do anything to control their surroundings. You can. Now close your eyes and say that again. By you not living your best life you are in fact living the same mindless life as a federal inmate on death row. You both just sit there waiting to die.
2. Purpose. Have a purpose. It is hard to get out of bed with no end goal in sight. It can be as generic as you need to give you motivation. Over time you can customize and fine tune it as your purpose begins to evolve. Every life has a purpose. You just have to get to know yourself to find out what it is that makes you tick. Your purpose is more to going to work and paying your bills. That is not life. That is what we have made others believe life to be but that can not be why we were made. To stress and cry and taunt recklessly in between life and death. No it is ignorant to think that. We are a species created to enjoy the simple pleasures of life. It can’t be bought we are given the right when we first take our first breath. Through the passage of time life has evolved to conform to what profits those at the top. In order to take some of our power back from those that only swell with pride when they take ours we only have to acknowledge our own life purpose to help us navigate the high seas of our life.
3. Goals. Goals are so important. So many of us when we are just lying content in our lives e decide to let it ride and enjoy for the time being. This is opportunity lost if we don’t keep our self on track. Last year I started out with 3 goals a day. I would write them down in a planner and check them off as they were completed. I would jot down potential goals or thoughts for the next day and would allow them to evolve. For a stay at home mom some may think that my goals would be easy. Keep the house clean and attend to the child. Those are things that I just assume in my role as wife and mother and don’t get written done. A goal should be something that enhances you personally. My daily 3 goals that I accomplish throughout the day are: read 1 chapter, write 1,000 to 1,500 words and of course play my violin for 30 minutes. These are goals that nobody but myself can accomplish. It is for my personal growth that I hope will keep me relevant in the ever expanding role.
4. Passion. Live your life with so much passion you don’t have time for anything else. The World has thrown at me so many obstacles that my head felt like it was going to spin off. Every blow coming at me was negative. Everything hurt. I cry. I feel the waves of depression lapping at my feet. There are days where I am so desperate for affection that I may reach to those that are below me. In those desperate times where I forget about my purpose I am reminded about my passion. Every time one of my fur-babies walks into the room I am reminded of their struggle. My life’s passion has become such where I want to minimize the hurt of those around me. I have cried more than enough tears to last several lifetimes. I have a very strong awareness to the cruelty of the World and the impact it has on us. Any time I can wrap a loving being in a warm embrace I am living my life with passion. I want to minimize the harm that we are doing to each other and live a life full of compassion and love.
5. Dreams. Where would we be without them. In my deepest heart break it has always been my dreams of a better tomorrow that keeps me getting up. My life has become so much more than those moments that take my breath away. It has become more of a dream to help others to realize their true potential. Be it a retired senior fight dog, our lil Californian terrier, the cats that have found safety and comfort in our home. They are my dreams. They remind me that just because they have given up on life that doesn’t mean I need to give up on them. That my dreams involve all of them and providing them a home where they are free to be for the rest of their days. When I think about my huge family of misfits that people decided they no longer want. I can’t help but think that there is a purpose to how we all found ourselves here.

It took a long hard battle to get here and at times I never thought it was possible. My own negative thoughts and energy prevented me from becoming anything more. I am not sure what sparked inside of me. It began long before my brush with death. Well not too long because at 37 I was still lost and struggling to find my way. The journey of life, although lived solo, can benefit from some guided distraction. We all need a little shelter after the storm and it is important to reach out at times.  The importance though is you need a strong conviction of who you are and what you need to accomplish because living in any other way just makes you a pawn in somebody else’s life and who wants to live their life like that.