Deeper Than Ourselves

We all want to believe that there is something out there, some meaning that quantifies our existence that makes our own being deeper than ourselves. We are just this small spec of dust in the eternal time clock of existence. Yes we are creating mass chaos and confusion instead of listening to the vibrations that are being emitted. It isn’t the disease or the potential for great loss of life that should be alarming. It should be the way that we are behaving. Like we are more entitled to the last row of toilet paper, those wipes or whatever it may be. One of my girlfriends couldn’t even find gauze which she needed to cover the burns for her chemo. So here she is fighting a real life fighting battle and all people see is an opportunity to make a few extra bucks. Shame on all who participate in this manner. My fear in humanity is being heightened but then I am reminded of facts. Before the smoke even settles and we start resurrecting the after math I could already see those colours to me that are most attractive. Those who were by my side amongst the chaos. Instead of hoarding of mass proportions we decided to open our doors, hearts and homes. Yes, yes we aren’t living vicariously. Hands are being washed and quarters are being sanitized all I am saying is if all I have is tomato sauce I know who I can count on to bring the pasta. What is in my cupboards is also in yours. I don’t survive this pandemic without you. That is what this virus has meant to me.

There has never been a case throughout history where we have never gotten control. We do. They tell us how to proceed to minimize the outbreak. Simple. To also minimize the most financial, economic and political pain it is best if we all lie dormant. Sounds so simple. No hoarding. No self righteous behaviour. Stay at home. Discover your families again. Sounds oh so poetic and majestic at the same time. Get to know yourself and the next steps of your future. How is anything bad going to interrupt your four walls I you stay the course. A few months of canned cupboard food and only each other to entertain us all under government advice. Forgive me for getting a lil excited but this sounds like the 1950’s all over again!! Resurrect the dinner parties, the murder mysteries the gatherings of under 50. As long as there is nobody who has travelled from foreign countries how can it not be contained. Let’s find the romance in our neighborhoods again as we allow those on the front lines to once again fight for our freedom. So to our communities let’s stop listening to propaganda. The only things that matter right now is: WASH YOUR HANDS, SANITIZE, DON’T LEAVE YOUR COUNTRY AND DON’T BE AN ASS!!

So to those asses that insist on hoarding all the toilet paper, canned goods, sanitizer like the couple in British Columbia I have this to say. You better hope that the virus claims everybody because when the germs begin to settle and they will. Shame on you and how you wanted to profit off of humanity. You are what is wrong with our future. You are showing others just what it means to be selfish, greedy and just down right unkind. Your friends and family should be ashamed knowing just how you planned to profit off of those that were suffering even further. I am talking about the jobs lost over this mass hysteria.  You just outed yourself of having zero compassion for all of humanity. How is that going to feel now going out of your house. Anybody who is trying to profit off of this will feel it worse in the end. Not because you have months upon months of tomato paste in your cupboards. But because you showed your true colours. Not only to yourself but to the rest of the World.

So while the World is running mad I take it as an opportunity. Underneath all the chaos where my frequency has come to lie I can focus on the silence of what is to come. I know that I am mere fractions of all that is in existence come together in an intricate art form for the whole World to enjoy. I know I am capable of great love and compassion. That not only will I give my shoes off my feet but also the last of my food in my cupboards. I would never want to live knowing I harmed or destroyed another. That underneath all the madness all that I have to offer that is mine I will give.  What I can’t give though is my character. That I have to keep building to shelter all of mankind. When I think of the stories my friends have shared and all the ways we continue to fail in humanity I can’t help but cry. I get it who am I. Why should you listen. I am telling you from experience. I am telling you from hope. I am telling you because I have seen the other side if just for a minute. That door that was opened was never completely closed for me. I can feel the existence the power that lays within. Please I am begging you all to take this time as a blessing not a curse. Don’t believe in all that hype believe in yourself. If you pull yourself in to protect yourself from the evil you will see it too.

I know I sound crazy but maybe I am. When I decided to dye my hair blue and enter my decade of mourning most thought I was crazy. But it was a symbol that I started almost two years ago now. I told my girlfriend then that I had to enter into it fully in order to experience it. She told me not to be sad. I remember thinking it was more than sad but being empty. Humanity continues to break my heart in so many ways you have no idea. I hate having these feelings so intense that it drives me insane. So I write. I explore and I travel to try and find somebody that can maybe understand me. I have so much love for all of you I can’t explain. I honestly wish you could feel what I feel and know how special you all truly are. So before I am reduced to puddles on my keyboard I once again will urge all of you. Look for a deeper meaning. A deeper meaning then yourself. Love Sweet Ruby xx

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