When Life Loses Meaning

Our storey of life always seems like it is missing a few chapters. Maybe even a storey line, a hero. We are always looking for something to fill the pages often not looking to ourselves as being the hero we need to save us from ourselves. We are in fact our own worst enemy. We know which buttons to hit to set off a tailspin of emotions that we can very rarely bounce back from. Factor in our current World events and everybody everywhere is making a mockery over how life is currently. We shouldn’t be making fun of those that survived through terrible times. What sort of victory is it to have somebody to survive through the great depression only have them to succumb to this disease now.

There is no promise of a prosperous life. There is no guarantee either if we all do the right things and live the right way that we will be guaranteed a long life. We can try to do right by all these people and then what? What about you? We all have to fall into some sort of role now a days. We have to be able to define ourselves by the value we bring to others. If we try to hard to appease our own souls we are deemed as an outcast or ogre. So often we fear the things we don’t understand. Too often it is us we don’t understand. I think that should be the greatest fear. Not living up to our true potential or always living in somebody else’s shadows. Isn’t that what we are in essence doing now. Living in somebody else’s shadows. To step into a role simply because that is what my parents did should not be an acceptable answer to anybody’s future. Yes if there is passion then by all means. That is what is so confusing. Are we living our lives for somebody else or for ourselves.

It would depend on what brings you joy. Is there enough joy that comes your way without interfering in somebody else’s. I hate the mentality that the only way to burn bright is to burn out somebody else’s candle. Before it was bad. Now I feel it is even worse. The only way some of us are getting out of the shadows is to degrade on another person art or being. That is who we have become.  We were to quick to buy into the beliefs that if we lived on the straight and narrows that good fortune would find us. Now with the whole World crumbling around us where now will the good fortune come from.

Too many great things happen to some of the greatest people. Their pain and heartbreak resonating throughout the framework of time. Does the life lost lose meaning just because you can’t hold onto that feeling anymore? Have we convinced ourselves that in order for us to amount to anything we must have the best of everything? What happens when everything is gone do we immediately become worthless. Is my life worth nothing because I no longer have possessions? What about all those that have lived before us? Does their life automatically have no meaning cuz they never travelled? Never owned a car? Never got a hundred likes on a profile picture? How and when did it come about that this is all we were ever meant to be. Lifeless drones sucking the life out of each other on this information superhighway that seems to by the fast track to the route666.

My life is even spinning further into having no meaning. Yes I have a hard working husband but that is where it stops. There is no love, no appreciation, no thanks. Just recently he brought home a 6 week old puppy that has basically been my responsible to train. On top of all of our cats, chores and son he decided to add in one more life. It is impossible to stay on top of everything. The pup barks as soon as he gets up waking up my son almost immediately. There is messes to clean food to cook all trying to get the house in some sort of order before my husband gets home. I will barely get a free second to myself as all free time is spent trying to clean or educate my son. (he is loving his number and alphabet puzzles). We aren’t able to go to our regular alack of empathy inside of them is driving me insane. Even the libraries are close and have had no talks of reopening.

It is hard to stay level headed when you feel like jumping off a cliff. Every free waking second is spent on anot

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