The problem with being a perfectionist is it truly doesn’t exist. You can whittle away what ever it is that you are needing it for but it can never truly be obtained. Take Old Hollywood glamour. Movie stars of times forgotten looked like stars. Now a days it is common practice to wear flannel, runners and leggings. Is it out of laziness or sheer boredom that has allowed their mind to snap and be seen in that manner. It is like or obtainment of perfection ceases to exist once we think it is obtained and then what a life filled with sloth like behaviour. If life was meant to be lounged there would have been no reason to explore other shores or terrorize other people. If a perfect life was one where you did not have to take part at all we would be beings going nowhere with nothing. But isn’t that how we end up after all.
Perfection can only be seen from the one who is in question. You can’t expect another to know your idiosyncrasies and more than you will be able to identify yours. You can see the crest fallen look of another when you don’t see the beauty on what they treasure so dear. Our World looks more like an elementary school from above. You have the bullies gathering around to dictate how they want things to be. You have the bright intelligent students trying to best adapt to their new normal while maybe trying to find a solution to make it better. and of course then you have those that just seem to not care. With so many people milling about you think sooner or later we would get it right…wouldn’t we?
Perfection can never exist. Once we obtain some sort of feeling of such a new curveball comes down our way. Life is all about the journey and the capacity and willingness to see yourself humbly in the reflection of your fellow man. Why would we all be content in living the same mediocre existence? Maybe it is because for some we don’t see our existence as being just so. We have embraced the possibility that life isn’t meant to be perfect. Maybe close in our eyes but never can that end goal be obtained. Life is always changing and morphing in ways that will always be out of our control. It seems like almost everyday has the possibility of spinning out of control and all I can do is my best to try and minimize the outcome.
Take my husband’s puppy. He is never home to try and train him. During this crazy time my husband is still working just as much as every. I have accepted my role more now as the matriarch. I have decided to run my house like a finely tuned violin. Try to work in magic into everyday while keeping your childlike wonder without being bald by the end. This dog barks from the moment he wakes up until he finally goes to sleep. Right now he is sitting by the closed bedroom door barking. There is only so much I can do to try and teach him right from wrong. Consistency is key. All of a sudden the puppy my husband so desperately wanted has now become my greatest source of headache. It is not like my husband has set aside any time to try and get him disciplined. My choice are to keep fighting with my husband, which has clearly fallen on deaf ears or correct the problem myself. So on top of everything else inside my day I now have to take the hours needed to ensure this puppy grows up with basic manners and behaviours instead of getting the run of the house.
Maybe my desire to be perfect is more of a desire to be loved. Those two though never will run parallel. Usually you either love yourself or get love from the outside. The physical touch of another is what drives us to do insane things. It will make us leave or husband’s abandon our children and do a mountain of other detrimental tasks. We want to have a life full of meaning but to often it is tied t the outcome of another. If our feelings aren’t immediately reciprocated that’s ok there will be another coming along shortly. We are either in it for the long haul or we off at the next stop. To often we forget the purpose of the journey as we pick up way to many “how-to” manuals on the way. The truth is nobody can truly tell you the right direction your life should be going. How can they possibly know. They have no idea what you have been exposed to or what you have seen. As far as they are concerned all they know is your life has been a far fetched tale with no weight or value to it. If that is the case does that mean your life was a waste. Even those created by chance have a purpose. I life wouldn’t exist if it was all left to chance. Every being has a purpose. You can truly believe that.
If no life is perfect should we give up on trying. It is the dance that counts and the seemingly effortless way you make all the chaos feel like magic. It is knowing and accepting that although each day is filled with promise there will always be those days that never seem just right. It is having faith that those around you have a heart and intention like yours. There is true beauty in the simplicity of being thankful for each day. it is the way the magical dance unfolds as you lay exhausted at the end of every day. Yes there may be days where there are dishes in the sink or toys on the floor but tomorrow is a new day. As long as there is happiness and life from all beings then in my eyes that day was truly perfect. Yes there may be little crack that appear in our foundation but that is just what happens over time. The perfection comes in knowing that within these four walls we are family trying our best to live for each other in this vastly growing imperfect World.