Fearless in my Wonderlust

I wonder what makes us crave the attention and affection of those around us who don’t even know that we exist. Maybe they did at one time but whatever they fed us to keep us hooked is no longer being served. The idea that we become nothing more than a passing fancy throughout time hardens the heart. Dreaming of the day when they noticed you or will notice again is enough to drive anybody insane. You question your value, your worth, your importance in this ever growing puzzle called life. At times it is hard to focus on anything but. Your whole life changes to the pattern that you hope they will recognize. Nothing hurts the heart more then affections and feelings that aren’t returned.  On all levels it hurts. We dilute our own value when we beg for attention that isn’t reciprocated. Life is hard enough as it is without having to feel that strain upon yourself.
Is it the desiring of something that will always be just out of your grasp? You know. Always wanting what you can’t have. I wonder how the other person feels knowing that they have that kind of hold on you. We all must have at least one person that makes us rethink our whole course path. The forever magical “what if’s”. For whatever the reasons fate has intervened and kept whatever it is will kill you apart. At least that is what I think. Sometimes in life without even knowing the reasons why we have a lil push in the right direction. If we resist in it too much though it will eventually lead to our demise. Life isn’t about getting exactly what you want it comes in finding in everything those things in which you need.

There is something interwoven into every single day that will ight up your life and make you give thanks. Lucky enough most of the time I am surrounded in this energy. My wonderful family that extends into fur, feathers and now skin reminds me the importance of my life. I nurture, care for and become there companions throughout life. In the absence of family I have become theirs. As much as they bring me unconditional love it is my turn to do the same. We never really think much about the animals we bring into our home and what life means for them. Since the time most of them crawl out of the womb there are plans for them to leave their family. Now imagine if you can life for them in the wild. Think of a species in nature that lives out their days all alone. Can you? Could it be that all of us get comfort from feeling we aren’t the only ones alone in the World. Why is that our beloved pets aren’t entitled to the same.

Think of the breeder who breeds one female to almost exhaustion. Feeling the movement in life inside of her over and over again. Having the babies ripped away so she can produce more. Her life becoming that of a mere object than a loving being. After they have served their purpose they got tossed aside. Sometimes ending up in shelters, especially after having broken a limb from all the abuse. Their are deep emotional scars that come with this type of abuse. The person in charge incapable of thinking this way is who we fear most. When we consider any life to be above our own we are seriously missing the point.

Yes I grew up on a farm where we raised cattle for consumption. But are cattle were free to roam the fields in the manner that they chose. We would rotate them throughout the fields so they always had fresh grass. They had access to a free running creek, shelter, each other. Even in the Spring when the babies were on the way they were allowed to love them and be a family. Even the bulls would be shipped out every second year to ensure the bloodline wouldn’t become one and the same. When it came to the fall they would decide on which ones they would consume over the winter and what ones would stay until the next year. What a short life for these animals now that I think about. They had one purpose in life and that was to sustain my family. I know we utilized as much as the animal as we could. We valued their contribution to us and we ensured that what they gave up to us with our life we would make sure lived on.

I guess I went to the extreme to show that in life there is usually a circle. We always end up where we began. That like a circle as we begin out on our journey we go so far as to not be able to reach the other side. The damage down to those with the circle limits are those waiting on the outside will help forecast the journey to what lays in store. We are born alone and we will die alone. Nobody can change that or take that away from us. To strengthen our being from the inside will help give us the feeling of satisfaction on the out. When your core is rotten your integrity is compromised and it becomes incredibly impossible to keep things in balance long term. As your circle begins to spin out of control we really only have ourselves to blame for the outcome. If things were easy there would be no point in doing them. The way we intimidate our minds makes us our own greatest bully. The greatest accomplishment we can muster of all time is when we believe in ourselves continuously. Nothing great ever came out of a mediocre man. We only have to look out into the mainstream to see this as being true. In my mind I can either be the greatest gift of all time or a complete failure to the World. The only person I hurt in the end is myself. What I am trying to say is now is the best time to find the magic within you! To reach for those stars and never let go. It is ok keep believing in fairy tales and unleashing the magic in the dreams from within. I wouldn’t be where I am today if I stopped believing that life could be better. I was getting tired of getting back up and always tripping over my feet. Something incredible began to happen though as I lifted myself back up over and over again. I started to believe in myself again and became fearless in my wonderlust. I know there is no time like the present to believe in myself again. I owe it to myself to at least try to be true.

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