The Lies, The Tales of a Spurned Sibling

Who do you trust? Who do you move to when the rest of the World closes their doors on you and turn off all the lights. Some of us are lucky enough to be blessed with a family that no matter what will always have our backs. When push comes to shove they will be the ones standing right in front of you daring your tormentors to take the first swing so they can absorb the blow. If it is a sibling in your corner you know the struggle. Some of these relationships are strained. Some of these relationships will appear more toxic than most but at the end of the day there is this calmness that envelopes you. You know that even if your whole World came crashing down that they are there. I have this kind of relationship with my sisters. We fight worse than cat and dogs and we annoy the hell out of each other but there are certain bridges that we don’t cross.
Me and my sister have said some words. And I mean words that I can not even type here. I would never ever wish her physical harm by my hand or somebody else’s. I didn’t witness the event I was only told about it. Whether or not it happened the way that it did isn’t for me to say. But it does serve as kind of a lesson of how a sibling shouldn’t treat another. Imagine a son going to his parent’s house to help his dad set up a cellular phone that the son had gotten for the Dad. A new phone is always an exciting learning curve that can be annoying for the generation above all this technology crap. I still don’t know how to use half of the functions on my phone. And HD camera’s shouldn’t be a thing when you are over 40. Just saying but I digress. Anyways we all have an opinion and I suppose that during a recent visit the brother was talking to the other about how much he hated his girlfriend. It is common knowledge that his girlfriend gets around if you know what a mean. In my day we would refer to her as the town pump and with gas prices at an all time low everybody gets a cheap ride.
As the brother finishes with his Dad to go home to his wife and kids after a long days work who comes screeching in but the said girlfriend. Blocking in his car she hits record on her cell phone and tries to bate the brother to react. Meanwhile the brother is watching in the window laughing as all hell gets unleashed. If you knew what and why it was said there is no room for argument here. The reason for his comments were simple. She has always and will always be jealous of the lifestyle he acquired. Maybe it is the other brother that she is after but no woman reacts like that. She has this holier than though attitude. The brother used to be an alcoholic. USED to be.  It shouldn’t be a life sentence when you work so hard to change your life around.
Why do we bother to protect those that sell us out faster than we can finish this sentence. You want the reality here it is.  His girlfriend is the town pump. She is the one who twists and contorts fiction into fact to distort into the storey line that she needs. Imagine this. I was safely tucked inside my bed trying to get my son to sleep when the alert goes off. It is a message from a man I have no idea. Yelling at me. Telling me to control my husband. Verbally assaulting me to the point that I fear for my life. As it turns out the beef that has resulted from her own promiscuity has now spilled into my life. Her crazy ex defending his baby daughter’s mother. Who is not so much of a baby.  Apparently he liked some 17 year old pictures. What is the legal age of consent 16? 18? Man I have no idea. Do I care? I am not too sure at this point but to be this brother…the Uncle to light the torches and send them our way!!! Damn what a slimeball!
So the World wanted me to build a fortress. Well you got one. You wanted me to sit here and deny my natural instinct of believing that there was some good left in the World. Since as long as I can remember I have always been the refuse left to be disposed of. I don’t even care anymore if anybody believes me. My tear stained cheeks will tell the tale of who I tried to be. How I long for just one moment where I could feel loved again. That great peace that comes from feeling that embrace. I may not always hear the whispers but I try to be my best. As I fade away fromnothing I struggle to catch my breath. Why does life have to feel tortured. I am so tired of being alone. I count the days down to minutes and shudder at who I have become. Please don’t let the darkness take me. Please let the light shine in. I stand here at the cusp of greatness yet nothing really matter. Looking forward, glancing back I am tired of being ridiculed. Tired of not being able to hear my own voice.  From the day I started this journey I remember being ridiculed. All I wanted was a chance to be the best mother I could be. All I wanted was a chance to set my heart free and allow it the chance to come back. I walk alone because I have to. Nobody understands my pain. The eternal longing for something that will never transpire. Dare I walk into the valley of death to see who I always dreamed I could be our doomed to walk an eternity alone. Or maybe it is having the courage to speak the truth and be damned about the consequences.
Evil knows many shapes and sometimes it comes in the form of a friend you have known all along. What I know from my experience is never look a gift horse in the mouth and never be scared to look somebody in the eye. I know my truth and I know what is right. So where retaliation steps in at no cost I stand firm on my convictions and say not today Satan. That is who my brother in law has become. He has allowed his own discontent rot his own heart. He has chosen the love of the wicked instead of  her own flesh in blood. Where my son asks where is Uncle is one can only communicate that she has better things to do. Even now as I write she says that none of this is her problem. She should come to her brothers aide instead of fabricating lies to get her own evil ways. There is only one truth and that is she is trying to be the puppeteer. There is never a dry eye or a dull moment as far as our lives are concerned. Here we are on our 3 year anniversary and strangers think they can come weasel there way in between. I am tired but I am not weak. If you think for one second I would ever leave my son in the hands of these serpents you are wrong. I will always speak my truth and I will stand firm on that. Love me or hate me I will always be loyal to my family. Pick a battle you can win not one where you don’t even stand a chance in hell.

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s