They say that inside of our Grandmother’s was the very thought of us. Well not thought of us were us. If that were true then the premise of we only exist as long as we exist in somebody else’s mind would almost fit the timeline as well? Right? My mind still asks the question of where do we go when we die. Is it true we just become nothing. Or is it the reason for everything in the first place? What else do people say…of love and light? Think of what that could possibly mean. Here on Earth this very small speck of a spot in this infinite vast of space that we are all a part of in this given time. I try to look for the connection that should come when space and time combine and to me that time comes when two souls are connected, united to make one. Two cells from two timelines coming together to create heat a new life is born straight from the heavens sent.

Maybe the reason why we never reach the stars (or at least the intention of such) is because the collision of two is of life and death. There are a lot of things we have done throughout history that we should be ashamed of. It is isn’t just one race it is all of us. We are all guilty of letting our greed rule our decision to engage in violence to get what we want. Littered stories through history recount how when given the chance some tyrant chose his wealth and power over millions. Greed is not the secret of life. Anytime you engage in sinful activity you dim your shine. It makes it harder for the heavens to find you and shine their good intention and free will.

With that thought i mind I like to ask myself am I a good representation of who my Grandmother’s all hoped that I would be (become). Grandparent’s are so super cool and I honour the time I got to spend with them. I find myself thinking about them more and the life we got to share before m ego tried to tell me differently. Love how after all this time I still can recall a memory of life on the farm and her grey pumps and handmade dress and apron. She was the best. I want to be like her. When I think about love I think about her light and if I want to believe in all that then maybe somehow she is alive again inside of my daughter (if she was on her way).

With all that information tossing together like the fruitiest of salads I wonder just what was in the wine I had just drank. But seriously thought, at least I think, sometimes I think we have moved ourselves towards this surreal thinking of where we can hardly contain ourselves anymore. I think the gifts we received throughout time were there to act as guiding points because every once in awhile shooting stars hit the Earth so why out of nowhere wouldn’t we see a man or two rise. What is a difference between those that are living and those that are dead? Body temperature. One is hot and one is cold. And if hot air rises wouldn’t we eventually return tot he heavens once again? We know that beyond Earth’s sphere is infinite space where time stands still and there is nothing but darkness just waiting to be born.

It is so weird to me that everything we are and everything we were lies inside of us and our children but we will do anything and everything in our power to avoid them and escape ourselves. Think the turbulent way we perverted the definition of growing up. Look at the difference I feel like I may have been on the cusp. Yes gaming was cool but it was all about the Atari and Nintendo. School used to be fun and now there is a pandemic. Maybe I waited to long to have my own kids and there is a 20 year gap but I find I find myself gasping thinking oh my gosh things have sure changed. More to that restaurants are dropping like flies and everybody is scared of their livelihood. What I can’t help but think is how much stronger one’s light would be if they were also focusing on the love that they could be getting back.

I would ask if you would think that I am annoying and some would say marginally at best. Lol. It is my charm. A little over whelming at times. I found myself getting caught up in the social media tailspin taking photos that really don’t matter to anybody but me. I imagined what my son would do with my phone with a phone filled with photos of just me. I take the odd here and there photo but I also remember that depending on where and when it happens my phone may never be returned to my son as well. Obviously you want there to be moments captured to remind you of times long past but you also like the reassurance of having such a picture brings. What do I care about the random stranger who may take a look at my pic or my eyes when they are older when my mind isn’t as sharp.

Every so often there will be the tragic loss of a life taken way too soon. When that time happens there is always an explosion in the sky. As the star comes to an end so does the lifeline of the individual with no potential for future offspring to be born. It would explain the pyramid’s and the Aztec’s and all the other traditions that reached for the sky. Or the beautiful people that saw life in all things and practiced the simple art of living and breathing. It is all an art form. It is all life. Without one you wouldn’t have the other, you wouldn’t have light and love.