No matter how hard I try my evolutionary quest for serenity always evades me. I touch close to what seems to be sanity but then something threatens to enter into my realm of reality intoxicating my thoughts with doubt. The only peace that I feel calm enough to bask in are the sounds and feels that bind me closer to nature. The heat of the sun, the dizzying yet calming effect of a babbling brook. I long to hear the ocean waves beating relentlessly against the shells like it has done consistently since the very beginning of time. My thoughts get contaminated with the beliefs of so many that have some how convinced themselves that their existence now should mean something more than so many others that have walked on this Earth thousands upon thousands of centuries before us. Where once the eye could scan the skyline and see nothing more than natures art work, we can barely see through the smog and smoke that we have convinced ourselves means we have finally found success.

Does it seem odd to you that we ran head first in the opposite direction of so many other civilizations that have come before us? Throughout time every story is the same. You are born into a family. You grow and as soon as you are able you start growing into your role not only into your family but into your community as well. Your community can simply be where you fall into the hierarchy of your family. Do you live in a farm? What role can you master in order to become an asset instead of a liability and left behind in the dust? The most successful family units usually run in this formation in some fashion or another. We all need to feel that we have a purpose in this existence and it has to go beyond just living to work and die because that is where we are going. It used to be our purpose was to have an heir to carry on our family beliefs and traditions. Having a strong foundation ensured all of your hard work wasn’t for nothing. With nobody to hand down your stories to or your most prized possessions all that you have ever known get’s loaded up into the dust bin and thrown out with yesterdays news. That’s where we are propelling ourselves forward to. No legacy. No passion. No purpose.

There are so many faults that happen in today’s existence but the one thing we can all agree on is the birth of our children. The roles of our parents have changed considerable over time. The mother was always the nurturer and the father the protector and provider. My mind keeps me in the house that my Great Grandfather built when he first got to this country. Cutting down his own logs and molding the logs together with a clay like substance. I have no idea how it dried or sealed but it was there to keep them warm over the coldest of Canadian winters. When I think of that simplistic existence so in tune with nature that is when my spirit finally feels free. My heart feels like it is dancing because I am finally home. That feeling of purpose and love and being lighter than air is something though you can keep inside of you so you can visit from time to time. At least I do. I like to run through the fields chasing my Grandfather’s cows just like a used to on a hot July’s day when the grass was just about ready to cut so it was over my head. We weren’t really supposed to be on this of the field but that allure of being somewhere where nobody could see you made you invisible if only for that minute it took to get yelled at by your Grandma from the other end of the field.

I feel the biggest mistake we made when we ran away from our homes into the arms of these corporate strangers. They never had any of our intentions at heart. They sold us these great idea’s and dreams about what life should be but little did we know we began already knowing it all. We knew our son’s had it in them to be incredible beings. That they would grow bigger and stronger in the shadow’s of their father’s until they were men enough to go and care for their own families. They would take with them the good habits and skills they acquired in their youth and combine it with the unique female qualities that their wife would bring. Our daughter’s would grow to be polite young women possessing the skills and the knowledge to care for the house and their children. There should have been no shame given for the wife that wanted to stay at home and perfect her homemaking skills nor should have there been no shame for a men who prefers to provide for his family by using the skills of his hands.

One of the first labels we gave was that of the White and Blue collar. how ridiculous is that? Here is a chair why don’t you just sit there and stare and those who break their backs and work their fingers raw are deemed to be the ones with less than adequately titled jobs. Why was there such a strong pull between dividing the family and those who were deemed upper class. Don’t work a day and we will throw you accolades. Work to your death providing for yourself, family and community and we will pay you back with a beautifully laid unmarked grave. The battles we fought were never for us or about us. History will tell us we fought for freedom and the resistance against fear. Fear of the unknown and the differences that each culture possessed. Except looking back there wasn’t so much differences as there were beliefs handed down consistently throughout time. Divide the family and make them eternally weak to strengthen the villainous plan of the entitled, the elite.