I wonder what is stopping us from truly listening to each other. I know there is the culture that you can share in too much but should we really put limitations on what is weighing on the heart. Imagine how much different the world would be if we stopped trying to be so artificial and become raw, more authentic. We don’t want to listen to the real tales coming from real people because it makes us uncomfortable. But we glorify rape culture and violence and death when it is all you can see out on that silver screen. There are incredibly violent and evil people living amongst us but we don’t want to talk about their sins because it will bring more to light. Shaming the victim who is having a hard enough time trying to embrace life after tragedy. How can you run away from the horror when it is running rampant in your nightmares. If your deepest darkest thoughts that bring you to the edge can never resurface how can you ever let them go. Sometimes we have to repeat the horrors taking away all it’s power by passing it on to another. We can’t truly live behind closed doors these days because if you are what are you hiding. If you aren’t transparent and living straight to your truth you will always live dishonest and incredibly pain If you can’t share in your pain how can you ever finally let it go.

We aren’t alone in our pain and grief right now it is affecting each and every one of us. Some live in denial, some may truly live free but there will always be this twinge this reminder that will never set you free. In life we were all presented with the same dangers of living. They came to us in the form of the seven deadly sins. When you go down the list and you put yourself into that character, tell me you haven’t danced with desire inside each one of these. What we have been made to believe is the secret of life is the farthest from the truth and we see it crumbling before our eyes. What is sense in having power if it means you will hurt another. Sure you are fed but what about your neighbours and their neighbours neighbours. We are becoming this race of people that only looks out for number one.  And what choice do we have if are planning to survive. It’s almost like in the small town thinking mentally. When you live a small town everybody is looking out for each other. You recognize when anybody knew is around and you alert your neighbours when there is signs of theft and mischief.  As a kid people you didn’t even recognize knew your father. People truly did care for your safety and your well being. The same can be said when picking a post secondary school. I know that by going to the big city I would be just another number lost in the crowd. I moved to the interior where I could at least build a relationship with my teacher. There is something to be said for having mentors and role models. I wonder too if our children will get lost in these bigger city school. In my high school my principal was more like my friend. Yes he had no problem handing out detention or even suspending me but if I was in some serious trouble I knew I could depend on him. I wonder if those relationships are still being built. Who are our children’s role models, their listening ears. What I know from my life and it’s experience is I want to listen to you to help heal your heart just like talking to you has healed mine.

Just so you know I want to validate your tragedy. I know that sometimes we stay away from the joys of our life’s stories because in their passing it will start to hurt another’s heart.  What weighs on your heart continuously is something that needs no interruption and certainly no comparison.  Nothing hardens a heart more permanently then saying I can relate or I know what you mean.  It doesn’t matter if the experience is exactly the same. It is the combination of all these experiences and how they relate and intertwine. The experience maybe similar but the feelings are never the same. It matters if it is the first time or if it has happened so many times you are now numb. We have to validate the spirit and that need to shine on.  You can never relate because it is not quite the life that you have been living and experience. Is there shame in admitting that you are sorry for what happened to them and you can only imagine how they may feel. Let them talk and share freely and for once let the moment be all about them. Even in health I have never known somebody to recover without first getting the yucky all out of them.  And if you have nowhere for the words of your experience to be laid on by compassionate ears. It will be harder to heal the pain that hurts you the longer it remains unheard.

I will listen to you with interest like when I read a good book. The books I love to read are about the lives of others so why not learn about them first hand. We are all on an interesting journey filled with so many incredible ups and even more painful downs. There is nothing that we are experiencing that another hasn’t already faced. I know that seems impossible but there are others living similar lives to yours. No matter the pain, no matter the sorrow what heals them both is the promise of tomorrow.