To Be Finished or Whole

“Perhaps the hardest thing I’ve learned, and still struggle with, is that I don’t have to be finished in order to be whole.”

Really think of what that means. Maybe it means something different from person to person. Or maybe just like mathematics once we all get on the same wave length than there can only be one meaning. Think of what it means for one to feel whole? Does it mean that one person is brainwashing and the others are just following suit? Or does it mean doing the right thing from moment to moment can only possibly mean one thing to the righteous person. Maybe righteous is too bold of a word but what I am trying to say infinite meanings means it is yet to be proven so in facto we can only truly have one definition when it comes to being whole.

The idea of being finished? Isn’t that something that we are always reaching for? The idea of being complete? How are we meant to be something that is impossible to obtain while living? We are giving an opportunity in human form to go on with our day and inspire magical things yet we satisfy our urges with tangible things. We want the biggest house but not to fill the rooms with laughter but to serve as a beacon to show off to the neighbours. We want the biggest, fastest cars not because we have anywhere important we need to go we just like having the best things. Closets full of clothes that we only wear to show off to other people.  All these things to show that we have made it in the world but do these assets actually mean anything?

We spend our whole lives working towards feeling complete when all we need has been baried deep inside us. Every insecurity we have ever experienced covering up who we were truly meant to be. As a child who loved animals all I wanted to do was share my life with them. I wanted to love them the way they were designed to be loved as curled up babies sleeping in their mothers wombs. The selfless way they look towards us for love and the cowards way we look towards them as animals. They are more than animals, they are living beings. The farther we get from their humility the more horrible it is we are to become.

I am not ready to be finished yet. To me when you are finally done becoming all that you are there is only one thing to do. You sit and wait for the inevitable to occur replaying the moments you treasure dear. There are those that you thought would have played a bigger picture in your end story but they are nowhere to be found. Some say you are lucky to have lasted this long but once you hit your peak and there is nobody waiting for you does it truly feel like luck? With nobody left to reminisce with what happens to you? Where do you go?

Nobody can enhance the way it feels to be alive. I don’t mean somebody who is charming, witty and fun. Of course they make life better in the moment but how do you get that alive feeling to say? How do you light a fire in your life and keep it burning away? You have to fall in love with your life and the simplistic beauty that is hidden within. We are all given ir. Every single breathing thing on this Earth just wants to live. Flowers grow to the sky, squirrels forage, birds fly, children laugh. All these things we take for granted are so incredibly amazing. Have you ever watched a bird spread their wings and fly? They take that leap and their they go, off to ride the wind.

When was the last time you truly shared the energy of another being. When I visit with Daisy (my budgie) I close my eyes. Not the whole time. But enough for us to absorb in each others presence coming to a safe and happy place. She lands on the tips of my fingers and walks down to my elbow with her warm tiny feet. Her walk is like the happiest dance as she chirps the whole way. I bend my elbow brining her towards my chest and face. I like to feel her warm body against my cheek before she hops on my shoulders and flies away. She flies to greet her parents and siblings who are still in my care. With so much negativity these days I keep them here to keep them safe because althoug small their lives are so precious to me.

I feel whole but I don’t feel complete. I just know there is still so much left to experience and learn and grow. Not feeling complete doesn’t mean it’s bad. It all depends on how you arw looking at it. Who wants to live in the world where you have already realized your truest potential. It is like the athlete who peaks in high school what happens to them? You don’t just peak once in your life there are so many more things we can become and do. Sometimes society though sings another song. Sometimes it is easier to live in a world with little or no expectations but then that is all we will ever be. Wouldn’t you rather be a continuous work in progress than a shell of a person you were destined to be.

9 Comments Add yours

  1. Reblogged this on grendaliskingsite and commented:
    From Sweetrubyblues, It really made me stop and think, It is a big Question which I feel we all really need to answer for ourselves. Are we ever complete?


  2. So Ruby, I had to think about this, and had to think about it really hard. Thank you for posting this, and it is a very Deep Question, one of the hardest I have had. Finished or Whole?
    First I will say this, it is a phrase I came up with more than a decade ago, and it sort of answers your Question,

    “If You have Finished Learning, You have finished Living” And I think that it is so true which is why I still use it even today.

    So has you know several Religions, namely the Hindi and Buddhist both firmly believe that we must all attain a Purity of Soul, to Touch the Divine, to Pass on and Be content, to stop having to relive life time and again. To sit with the Divine. I think that that was also the original concept of what Jesus was trying to Teach us Humans, and maybe even the Jews with the 10 Commandments. Maybe, and I know a few who Follow either the Buddhist or Hindi way, but it is not everyone’s cup of tea (being honest here, not mine). But it is one way to go, to feel complete, totally whole, so Blessed, every waking moment of every day, it will take maybe a lifetime to attain (maybe several, but only if you remember.) We have touched on Karma before on here, and I feel that it is all to do with the same thing.

    Another way would be like the Hermit or Monk who shuns Worldly Goods and shuts themselves away from others unless one was to seek them out for Guidance, But doing this again is not for everyone.

    How can we be Complete when we are still alive, waiting for the End? I think that we can not, not until our very last Breath, until the electrical pulses within our Brain stop, then maybe we will be Complete. And Yes, True others will make it better, or worse in the short term (or not so short), but they can not Enhance how You, I, Anyone feels about being Alive, and I really mean You Feel really Alive, your mind is on fire, your Heart is Bursting, Every nerve ending is there, everything screaming at you IT IS GOOD TO BE ALIVE. No person can do that for you. We can only do it for ourselves, We have to work at it, every day, it is easy to hate, to become just like everyone else, but that is not becoming Whole, Complete, that is just being lazy, and it does not work for anybody.

    Organised Religion, follow my leader, I would not go so far has Brainwashing, but it is close, especially with certain sects, certain branches of some of the main Faiths, but all people are doing is following that which someone else wrote, maybe 50 years, maybe 3,000 years ago. But some find the Purity of Heart and Soul regardless, because the really do have Faith and Believe in what they conceive to be True.

    You Feel whole but not complete, then that is good, you have many years left ahead of you Ruby, you have much to offer the World (yes, including me), so much to give, but so much to learn, for we can not know everything, there is just not enough time. You have Love in your Heart and Soul, a husband and a son, a house, lots of small important mouths and hearts to nourish with every kind, loving action you give them all. I am not surprised you feel whole, and I am pleased for you, really am stoked for you that you feel that way. You are way ahead of most people, who’s shallowness will never make them feel whole.

    Finally one final thing, again, touched on this before on here, We all have lessons to learn, and for each of us it maybe different, and it could be big, or small, but always important, and we never know, unless we really try to work it out what those lessons we need to learn are, could be one, two, half a dozen, both big and small. And that, I think anyway, is all to do with the Wholeness and Complete, but there is always something to learn, right, so when our Life is complete, it is complete. I could go on about me and mine, and I will not go on about where will we go when we die, but this is not the time, nor place (at least not yet on the latter one) for either. But just my view, main part of my World view, and sorry to ramble on a bit.


    1. No apologies for rambles. Its how we make our way closer to the truth. Hmmm yes organized religion. Too hard to have faith in something that is ok with spilling any blood. Dig deep into most religions and you will see those in charge killing to get their way. I am not denying the existence of spiritual men who have graced our time line but where are the women? Are we just destined to always bs nurturers of kings?
      We need to stand strong in our own opinions and convictions instead of using those feelings to take away from others.
      Isn’t knowledge grande? Is if possible to learn it all. I wish I started reading sooner 🥰

      Liked by 1 person

      1. True, more blood is spilt because of some Religion or other, makes you wonder how do they keep their hands and Soul Clean. Oh there are many Women, like you, I know one or two, Jackie “Jax” Chambers from Girlschool is one such, never met such a beautiful Soul from any man, yes Rocker, Guitarist, but very so deeply Spiritual. A Pure joy to chat to for me (Plus she is an Icon of mine, but that is just an added bonus). Most of the Religions (Mainstream) are run by men, you know this, so the Women (Like Mary Magdalen) will be over shadowed and put down, Sexism is Rife, we all know this. Most are now classed has Witches (and we both know most peoples view on Witches over the years), but yes Most of the so called Gurus, Holy Men, self Titled Master this, master that, are Men, but they are not worth the time of day it takes to say Help me.

        Totally agree with the staying strong, had this argument before, plenty of room for everyone to have their own ideals and opinions , We could Learn from others, instead most will destroy because it is not their thoughts.

        I Love reading, will read almost anything, always something to learn, Hil ridicules me for how much I read, not just book, but on line information, History, Archaeology, Politics, anything to expand my own understanding of something. Maybe we can learn it all lol, maybe, but nothing else would ever get done, but we will be led or Guided to what we can learn from, maybe out of the blue, like me finding you Ruby, why Now? Why not a year before, or next year, but Now, so I know that what I need to Learn about will happen, maybe I learn it all, maybe enough, when I die, it will be enough, and the right time.


      2. I find my brush with death opened up a pathway for me to take 🥰 I just trust I will be taken to where I need to be ❤

        Liked by 1 person

      3. You will be Ruby, Someone is watching out for you, Divine, I know not who, but someone is looking out for you, they will Guide to where you need to go, just need to have Faith in Yourself, and listen to the sudden idea which comes out of the blue into your brain, It will be a Good Journey, and you will learn what you need to learn on the way.


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