Trying to be Decent

Who would you be if nobody talked down to you and if you always believed that you were capable of a life worth living and living for a better day? Did it start at a young age at the playground when you failed to get along with the growing crowd or did your eccentric ways find you in your later years, were you always born to be different sometimes not having a lot of common with the masses or even having something intelligent to say.

We all want to be somebody until some *sshat out there makes believe that we are incapable and there is no sense in trying we even take that chance. They hum and aww about their choices never truly getting up the courage to get up off the seat and take a kick at the can. Every morning I walk on timid egg shells trying to bring to life what it is I have in mind. I hate when those that don’t try to understand us call us lazy, don’t they know it is our insecurities that keep us paralyzed with fear. The negative naysayer’s of the world always putting us in our spot and having fun with their words and what it is they are trying to say. There is nothing humble about consistent demoralizing behaviour no matter who is serving it and how much the other party desires to eat crow. Life is tough to get energized we don’t need so much hate in the wings waiting to take our sails.

The struggle of life is we have to find the strength to keep going no matter how many times we get kicked out to the curb and we struggle out in the cold. Most days the best I can do is compare my existence to others making me thankful that I am alive in this time and not in some other lifetime that happened hundred of years before. There is so much potential to live a life so much more than our ancestors that have lived. A time when knowledge is at our fingertips and we are more aware of what it means to be decent. To be kind. To show compassion. To lend a hand and truly be a friend. We all have our struggles but we find our place in time eventually. Whether it is standing out in the sun among the masses are taking it all in from the sidelines on another’s countries shore.

I am amazed at how far each other’s *sses we have all become. We believed our success was dependant on the company that we keep until our company takes a nose dive and it is the thrill seeking that we begin to seek. There is nothing quite like believing that you have hit your lowest until you look downwards and see there is still more room to go. What if you fell to the rocky death below you? Would the water lap around you and carry you away from the shore? We live in a time when a man would rather kill his whole family then be a man to bring home papers and let his girls live another day. Domestic abuse is on the rise and we turn away it makes me sad that there is so much lost potential and so many innocent will lose their voices and their right to have their say. The idea that those when given complete control will take those that we love away. Why do we keep a man alive who can kill his innocent babies in an oil vat and bary their mother in a shallow grave. In what world do we live in where is mistress would say, “this is unbelievable! I can’t believe this monster was right under my nose.” No correction. That monster was already well aware and in your presence we were given the sick sense to know that somebody is evil you can’t tell me this man of pure evil didn’t make all your hair stand up and even set off a few nerves. Maybe not. Maybe is lies were just that good which is an indication that we should all be scared. Monsters walk freely among us and they take our babies to an early grave.

This is the world that we live in. We glorify the grotesque and reward evil. Just look at what Hollywood chooses to display. I remember when Titanic first came out I think back in 1997. Some time close to that. I remember it for several reasons the most being because of what my sister said. I wanted to be carried away with the idea of lost love just like Leo and Kate portrayed but my sister made it almost impossible for me. My sister asked me what I thought would happen to all the profits, you know the millions and millions dollars that all the starts were about to make. What about the families who never made it? Who lost everything? Why are some strangers who were never there at that time going to gain the most over all that was lost? It was my first insight into the idea that the big wigs of Hollywood only cared to capitalize because of somebody else’s pain. Throughout the years in Hollywood you will see it time and time again. Take the life of Henrietta Lacks, who’s that you might ask. Just an unrecognized, unnoticed lady of colour who saved millions of us because of the testing that they did on this poor woman. She rests in a unmarked, early grave because her cancer was too far gone and couldn’t be saved. Her cells are still used in medicine today even though she took her last breath 70 plus years ago but who is Henrietta Lacks? Just another lady glamourized by Hollywood and didn’t give her family a penny to rise her up from the grave. That is who we have become as humans as we will forget all us just for a little bit of profit. Human decency and respect flies out the window for most of us when it comes to being courteous and trying to live for another day.

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