What Has Always Been

What I can’t seem to shake when it comes to trying to figure out the meaning of life is why it would be different for each and every single one of us. You would think that after all this time there would be truth in our similarities but it seems we would rather stay divided than all live with even means.

There is so much true in emotion yet we try so hard to cover it up. Unless of course it erupts from deep inside of us then heaven save who ever may find themselves in our wake. I learned a lot from choosing to live with animals. I learned so much now than ever before. Sure it is a zoo at times but being able to watch these animals act is like something out of this world.

Take my sweet little Latte all 25 pounds. He gets swallowed up in the masses of the next two combined pushing 300 plus pounds. I see it in the way he smiles at me when I finally figure out what it is he needs. They all try there hand at communicating it is whether we want to slow our thoughts enough to let them be heard.

It’s not too hard to try to figure them out. You have to just observe their mannerisms they can be quite comical when they are trying to be understood. The way they care for each other too when they are raised all together. Our young pup who is not so young anymore still treat’s the old guy with the ultimate of respect. We have witnessed him spit out half of a McDonald’s cone because the old guy is on a diet. The way he puts his thoughts and feelings first I have never seen come from such a massive dog.

Latte always likes to keep me in his sight. Keeping his eyes on me to make sure I don’t lose my mind. Every time I start to slip into a manic mood he is right there nudging his cold nose into my hand to remind me that he is somebody who cares. Say what you want but I feel his energy all the time he is around. Think about it. An animal can go anywhere and hide anywhere from you but most times they want to be right where you are. Well ours do anyways. Go to sleep with maybe a dog and a cat and wake up to 3 dogs and probably 5 or 6 cats no joke. That should be one of the biggest gifts we can receive in life. To be respected and loved by those that really don’t have to. So much more than because we provide the basic necessities of life.

Dogs run in packs so it is to be expected that they follow us around but even the cats move from room to room. Well if they aren’t having their cat nap. Having that bond with any other living thing is such a sweet comforting thought. It takes a lot of fur and feathers to remind me these days just how great life is.

Sure the hiccups that come are only blimps on the radar. Trying to test my patience, worth and character to see if this is really who it is I say I am. There is something magical interwoven into my days at times it seems. Something so surreal that connects me and makes all my bad days seem good. For that small glimmer of hope it makes me dig in my heels and reach for the stars. I know where I want to go now it is time to put in all the work.

What would you do with yourself if you know how to make yourself full? Would you connect with those who made you or would you connect with the things that grow from the Earth. There has to be a connection to all this living and being and life. What does it all mean when it is over did we do all that we could possibly and more? Did we try to light up the night as we flew through the sky or did we keep our chins down to scared to finally fly?

There is no better time than now and tomorrow never comes. What we can do in one day can change our world and thinking it can touch the hearts of one other and maybe more. Does it matter how many lives you change if you saw the greatness in your own? The purpose that fuels your fire in your soul and makes you long and hunger for more.

To feel at peace with all that is left after everything we have already been through might be our truth and testament in this life. The promise to do better and be more authentic with ourselves while shedding old and dead weight. There is so much promise in tomorrow though if you are prepared to execute and dream.

There are a million reasons why I shouldn’t and so many will tell me that I am set to fail. I will never see my life like that again because I did sacrifice a lot to be here. For all those that I have once known and loved and who I may never or may see some time once again I make peace with those moments in my heart. I hope for the love of one more truth but I will be ok if that day never occurs again. I miss the arms of somebody who loves me but I know that life could hit with me more. I am thankful for these moments and blessings and the courage to keep on daring and dreaming for more. Maybe I will never be able to predict what is coming or even have the lust to want for anything more. The truth that I know to be real in my heart is I have always been good enough and more.

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