We Are All Dying

Ugggz another one of my birds died today and it just tares at me just a little bit more because of the circumstances. We all are a product of different circumstances and it is all in how we look at things shapes the person we become. For so many reasons this story is all wrong but just like the finest chocolate so bittersweet in it’s final song. Once again death has made it’s way to my vicinity and escaped from taking me too. Now I wonder why or was it all just because. The bird who died was the mate and partner of my only accidentally mating pair. Maybe we shall revisit their true love story just back in the glory of their final breath and cleanse the air.

I remember when I saw the post for 5 budgies free on Facebook marketplace and it included everything! The woman online just wanted them to go.  She had started off with 6 but they didn’t mate. Didn’t sing. So in her eyes they were just useless so they absolutely had to go. So I went to go see them. My Snow White Heart was over the top giddy. No kidding right lol Of course they offered to drop them off the next day. Even in there little hutch too. I had no knowledge about birds at the time just intrigued with their lives so I made them to be dropped off without my husband knowing.

He was mad actually. Livid pissed to be honest. Told me I just signed their death warrant as he stomped away. We had 9 cats lol but I so badly wanted birds so we worked on converting a room just for them. It may have taken me a bit longer to realize but soon it became obvious the birds were living in too cramped of space because they took out the odd man out. Remember how I told you there were 5? Well they just paired off and wouldn’t you know there was an egg in the corner of a squished lil house.

Ya. They had predetermined pairs and the pair in question were in love I watched him gather up seed and go to feed her as he sat on the window of their house. It was beautiful and selfless to see such unconditional love and to see it occurring in small animals is such an incredible life changing thing. They would snuggle and sing and would try to have more offspring and a few survived actually after it all. I have 3 of the girls living to this day and their mother, his significant other is in a cage all alone.

They have proven over and over to me again that they have feelings so maybe they value life. His head was crammed in the corner of the cage and I wrapped him in a cloth and took him out and turned him around and the sad look in his eyes was forever frozen in time. My heart broke in just knowing that they had said their final goodbye. I cleaned their cage free of filth and debris and topped up her food dishes and returned him wrapped in cloth to the bottom of the cage. Not for very long so she could see his life was gone and she could come to terms with it and move on.

At the bottom of her cage was one lone white egg which is incredible remarkable because the last one was clear. I didn’t want to disrupt the egg but her cage needed to be cleaned in order to get the feel of decay from the room. A promise of new beginnings now I am curious to see what feeling rules more. More than likely an accident during fertilization as he was getting on in years but I am curious to see what comes of this last lil spark of life all I know for sure is their love story brings a tear to my eye.

Love crosses species and I know this is true. It makes the most angriest of us humble and desiring nothing more. The true beauty and simplicity when it comes to even the simplest of things. The love as she has come to know has now come and gone and I wonder how she feels now that she is alone. I wish I could comfort her in her time of need. In my way I try to by being as gracious as I can been. I put paper bedding and hay around her egg. I filled up her seed and warmed her water just a bit to rest her toes. I know she was loved and I am so sad he is gone. I will now be mindful of the living as I wait for her to one day sing. That’s what’s birds do when they are happy and I am not sure that last time I heard her chirp. I am guilty of life getting too busy. I got to slow down before somebody gets hurt.

I love all that life brings with it all the promises and such. Well it also brings those unknowns that I will spend my whole life twisting over. Why are some people rich and others poor? And those that are capable and able to help others aren’t willing to do anything, not a damn thing at all. Weird isn’t? How righteous is that? Not very human friendly is it so if you ask me the game of life you didn’t win. It isn’t about how much you can take or consume before you end up dead. It is truly can you make a difference before your life is over and you have finally come to an end. Not a crossroads because those are long gone. Your last breath taken as life escapes you and you move on. Nothing can change the facts or how one can actually feel. When they cross over the land of the living to the dying like it is no big deal.

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