We are one ridiculous species if we fully heartedly believe that what we are doing here on Earth is right. I don’t even know where to begin.

So let me just try to get it all out. I don’t believe for one second that we were meant to evolve in such a cannabalistic way that we would implode by our own doing but here we are. Not me or you in particular but where the perversion to life all began. EVERYTHING that we needed to live a full, bountiful life we blew out of proportion and took it into our very own hands. The Earth is doomed. That is just a matter of fact. There is no way in knowing when the Circle of Life will begin to clap back.

You have to believe in the entities and spirits that keeps beings alive. Where they go when they finally become what they were always destined to be. We have made so many products that will never decompose. We even made weapons of mass destruction that would level all playing fields.

The idea that innocent lives need to pay because of one deranged man is INSANE!! But we made him that way when we made who was most successful with who had the most toys and dollars in the bank. A man determines his wealth by the assets that he keeps and not the love and compassion he holds in his heart. Innocent lives with opposed beliefs were slaughtered. They had to be. If humans actually evolved into who they were meant to be then there would be no need for demons and that forever place called Hell.

The 7 deadly sins are alive and well in EVERYBODY’s heart. It doesn’t matter who you make yourself out to be there is something in your heart that you are sinning on. Lusting on another’s life or feeding your gluttonous hole with anything else that was raised from this Earth just proves that. We believe that the lives that were lived before us were next to nothing and we carry ourselves about in that way. EVERYTHING that our ancestors spilled their blood for now is reduced to nothing. Does anybody keep anything that was passed down anymore or is it all sold for the highest dollar?

I long for the treasures that my Grandmother once had. Her rolling pin being the one thing that has made it’s way to my mind. To be able to hold that piece of wood in my hand that my Grandfather had carved for her. My heart breaks in knowing I wasn’t included in the decision making in what they kept or threw out. It’s ok truly. When I close my eyes I can feel her helping me know what I have to do. My garden is thriving and so is my heart just knowing we share the same blood that is moving through me. I am thankful for her. All that she was and all that she made me. I know that she wouldn’t be judging me for finding comfort in a plant. I know she would give me a hug and talk to me like old times. Tell me tales and sing me rhymes that have now become lost over the years.

So I think about her and I think about a lot of others too. Some people I knew and other’s were just famous. I like to read their autobiographies and try to relate to them in some shape or form. Take our sweet Miss Marilyn. What a beauty she was. I loved how she was in control of her body every time she made her way across the room. To perfect that sashay and calm demeanor is something that gives me hope. Every day I try to perfect what it means to be a woman, at least in mind anyhow. There was a time when we took pride in being a lady and now a lot of adorn pants just like a man. We fought for those rights so it is truly all ok but for me I want to be remembered for being a lady and not just on vacations and holidays.

Dying changes everything. Including for those of us who get a second chance and get sent back. I don’t remember those 12 minutes out of my body but what I do have is a determination that can never be swayed. Everybody tells you to get a plan and do everything in your power to watch it unfold. It won’t make sense to most people and you will want to quit most days but sooner or later something has to give or maybe you will finally cave. It gets worse when you have nobody on your side but all you need is you. There are people that are watching you that you don’t even know and those people are the reason why I have never lost my reserve. Well not for too long but I never back peddle or regret what I do. I am who I am for a reason. I am after all my Grandmother’s Granddaughter too. On both sides. But I am more connected to my paternal Grandmother. She is the one that is always in my heart and guiding me and I love the confidence that she has given me too.

The Circle of Life or is it impending doom? We keep carrying our garbage like it is going to just disappear. Sooner or later we are going to fall through this gas filled planet once we remove all the land mass. Garbage floats right? I think I have heard this talk about space garbage. Just because there is no limits to the galaxy that is so infinite doesn’t mean we have to be so hell bent on destroying it!!