The energy that is threatening to overcome me is suffocating at best. I am overwhelmed by what we as humans can excuse away before we are even capable of drawing up our last breath. There are spouses abusive towards their parents and children equally abusive to their parents where does it all end? There are so many of us who are destined for so much but we allow ourselves to deteriorate before we find out what it is all for. Of course it is overwhelmingly when it comes to the larger scheme of things. The only entity that seems to be replicating out of control is human and one day what choice will we have but to implode?
As we make moves to forever imprint our own identity into the forever framework of the unknown will become our demise. There are the doppelganger’s that have been sent to destroy us proving to us that our make-up is more than genetics and a string of DNA. If there is no medical connection between two human beings but they are trapped in the same body doesn’t that just reconfirm that our bodies are just vessels of matter and that is the only thing that is out of control. Who we allow ourselves to become in the bright rays of day is what matters most. The imprint on this time stamp will forever permeate inside every living being. My truth is a know who I am and how I got here and I am only irritating to those who want me to believe their own lies. I don’t have time to be distracted anymore by the evil’s of the world that are running rampant. I have knocked on death’s door and I have returned for a short time to one day even the score.
The score gets even when you take your last breath and your life flashes before you like a flash of lightning across the sky. That is how long your life is reflected in that picture. Just a glimpse of what could have been if you didn’t succumb to being mean. The jealous rage that surges on through will erode an exterior faster than one can even say no. The lies you told as a teen will come and haunt you so the only truth you need to hold onto hope in finding is getting to know yourself and try to live your dreams. If you can dream it you can conceive, short of course for those 3 wishes and of course a well versed magical heart. The pulse of every living thing beats on the same frequency. Who are we to obsess over an act so primitive and devoid of all meaning. Name another species that is sex crazed I will wait. Most species do what is necessary in order to evolve. There is more work to be done then laying flat on your back. Sure it can be deemed as good exercise but don’t forget so is running and I am tired of doing that. You can only keep running for so long till you give up and enjoy what it truly means to live and come alive.
I am trying to connect with nature more and light a fire in my soul. I have always felt comforted by water even though over the years I have become some what put off by the cold. If you lose site of something by not doing it every day of course you will one day lose touch. That is why you have to marinade in what you love and try to enjoy it as you move from room to room. I love to feel my emotions the good, bad and the coyote ugly but marinating in grief isn’t for everybody. It has to be for me because of what I believe and if I believe that there is life after this then I need to honour those that have already passed through. They are the closest connection now to reaching the other side. If I tell an angel I still think about them here on Earth will they reciprocate with giving me their blessing? At the end of the day if that blessing never comes do I still deny the fact that they were one day standing here? I can’t. I could never. Where once we lived a life where we were able to interact, for whatever reason or another the journey for one of us had to come to end. That is what drives me and overwhelms me all at the same time. That small piece of not knowing and am I living my life just right. If my ancestors are out there somewhere or they beaming with pride or are they nowhere to be found in the next realm or mine? That is why it is so important to live by your truth and embrace what you think is right. It can’t be too wrong of a feeling if you felt it at some point or another one night? Thoughts come to us for a reason even better in our dreams. The reality between what is real and what is coming is a blessing so many of us have but chose to ignore. Why would we listen to ourselves when we could listen to somebody else. Better from the words of a stranger than a being who has been riding with you your whole life.
So yesterday in honour of Mermaid Monday I gathered up my Mer gear and trotted off to the river. I decided to take some behind the scenes footage of where I like to go and how cold it was down by the river, it just snowed up here in Canada the other day!! I KNOW RIGHT!!! Check it out here !