In Defense of My Husband

Why not start the week defending the man who has provided for me and my family, am I right? With everything that is going on around the world I think it is time that I begin to set the record straight.

We met during a time where I was starting school and he was getting set into his regular routine. What caught my eye when it came to him was the relationship that he had with his mom. Sure, there were times when they would fight but isn’t that what happens when it comes to engaging with somebody you love? You know what buttons to push to get a reaction and in true child form it happens when one party doesn’t get their way. What I noticed is that he talked to his mom daily, almost annoyingly so, but isn’t that what you would want when entering a family anyways?

My husband is a true man. Works hard to provide for his family in almost every single way. Think about that. In our family he is the only grandchild who consistently cares for his Grandmother and parents consistently knowing that they gave him life and they need to be treated as such. Yes he maybe incredibly rough around the edges but he has never cheated on a partner or raised a hand in anger and in this incestual age I think that quality is worth its weight in gold. Living is almost impossible without a mate and who has time to bounce around from bed to bed to try to find one anymore.

I don’t know where it comes from when he lets insults slip from time to time. It hurts me more than he knows and I try to explain and maybe just maybe it was from how I was treated in relationships before. What I noticed though is he consistently shows up to my defense and that is what a real family should do. When you take a partner to build a future and family with that is like an investment in yourself that you can never get back. All that money spent and value added time goes to waste if you can’t trust the partner that you find yourself in close proximity with.

In 5.5 years my husband has never told me wanted to leave and never come back. He has never let his eyes wander or let his mind stray. That tells me everything I need to know. The hardest obstacle I think we ever had to cross together was a very public miscarriage on social media followed by a troll who engaged in a take down of my man. When friends accused my husband of something so far out there I dug my heels in and came to his defense. I closed down my Facebook after a very public altercation because the reality that I was faced with is you need to protect your home.

There is just something that comes when somebody viciously attacks your son’s father with little or no weight. Sure I publicly air our grievances and maybe just maybe I shouldn’t be doing so in such a way. Everybody hates my blog which makes me laugh. It’s not like it’s going to make me famous or that millions of people will ever read it. The truth hurts so much that once one person reads between the lines they get set off. I can’t help that I need to repeat all this garbage. I need to get rid of all this filth and release the weight.

My husband is tough. And he is a little bit crass but he would never ever ever turn the back on his family. I think we have to reconsider the outlet that he could of chose. So many gravitate towards drugs, alcohol, sex to numb their pain or to excuse who they are. The only thing my husband is guilty of is calling me names over and over again. I wish I could get him to stop and maybe in time he eventually will but maybe this is how he grew up around his family and after almost 4 decades it has become a part of him.

Maybe it is the lifestyle that makes a person so hard. You can’t change who you are entirely it becomes the very essence of us and it becomes forever engrained. The best qualities about my husband is he was born a family man. I couldn’t imagine having 3 families to visit so regularly but he tries to always do the best that he can. It would be stressful for sure and I suppose I don’t help that much. I try to clean regularly but we live in a zoo with so many lives to save. Not many are able to live their lives in such a way. We both have gotten a little lost in the mix of things with 9 cats, 3 dogs, 2 chinchillas, 5 budgies and 3 hermit crabs to make life more interesting a giant greenhouse that is becoming a lot of work.

When push comes to shove I will always chose my husband. An investment in my family that will carry us on throughout the years. Yes our lives are far from perfect but that depends on who you ask and how you feel. I would rather have a man who visits his aging Grandmother everyday instead of waiting to capitalize once she hits the grave. What he has shown me here in life is he cares more about the person than any paycheque can ever provide. He breaks himself for all of us so maybe I need to give him a little more slack. All I know is I chose him over everything and in my heart there will never be a chance to go back. To stand face to face with a man who will chose family every time over money is worth his weight in gold. I don’t need a million friends to mislead me and guide me. What I got in the end was my forever family and I am lucky to be able to say that this life that I am living never gets old.

2 Comments Add yours

  1. Raina B. says:

    I believe every individual and every family has their way of life and living. As long as there is love, kindness and respect and as long as you are happy, nothing else matters. And sometimes you do need to settle for certain things. From what I could fathom, I am sure you have taken your decisions after much thinking and I respect you for them. You know what you did why you did. Hope you and your family all the very best 🌸❤️

    Like

    1. Everyday my thoughts are about my family and how can I make their lives better. Of course my own happiness is a factor as well but life gets too confusing to bottle it all up and hope it goes away. I speak a little too freely but it does help ease my mind ❤ Hope you and yours are doing well. Sending you lots of love and light ❤

      Liked by 1 person

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