What Breaks Me

What breaks me is knowing how people act. Coming to terms with what human beings are capable of and trying to decide if it makes sense to live another day.

People are mean and not just any type of mean they are down right cruel. They would rather have you living six feet under then hanging with the stars on any given day. I wish that this wasn’t true but it is written across so many people’s faces. If they can’t have what you have then they will take it from you because the biggest and baddest among us are the ones that will always win.

With so many people that are putting themselves out there, there has been a subtle shift to turn the tides. Is it just me or is social media even more toxic then I have ever come to know before? I guess that would mean I am hanging around the wrong people and attracting the wrong attention because we all know what happens when you begin to hang around like people in kind.

My morning scroll is nothing about negativity and people making fun of each other. I am all for humour but I would rather impower then rip anybody down. I wonder about those who constantly make fun of themselves opening themselves up to constant ridicule. I have got a comment or two and it has brought me to my knees.

I know that we aren’t supposed to worry so much about all the things that are being said about us but it is kind of hard to do when it is all that one can hear. Not to mention that there are so many of us brining our own insecurities to the forefront in the attempt for other people to feel.

Sometimes it works and we are meant with compassion but what happens to those that end up breaking in half. It’s ok when we are the one citing the insults but what happens when another’s beliefs continues to get in the way?

Think about it. I am ok laughing at myself but what happens when another person agrees and then decides to add on. What does one feel? Shock? Alarm? Trepidation? Or anger that another being could possibly feel such a way.

What breaks me is how confusing life has become. Sometimes we are happy and sometimes we have had more than enough. How do we begin to move forward when so much has happened between us that we will never again be able to be the same?

How does one practice compassion when all they continuously get is a slap in the face? Rise up to the challenge of a new day except you over there, stand back and get out of the way. Isn’t that how it always happens sometimes. Somebody doesn’t like you so they use their power to try and influence another beings influence and say. Not to mention how they wreck havoc on one’s mind and brain.

What people are capable of will always break me and will be the final nail in my coffin before I take my last breath and die. I don’t know why. Why should I care about people who never knew me or gave a damn? I can’t help the way that I feel because I want everybody to live the best life that they can.

I think that is why I rescue so many animals and give up my freedom so that they can enjoy their life. There is nobody so far worth knowing that can pry me away from those hungry eyes. Animals love us unconditionally and they pay us back with loyalty and pride. The way their body responds at the site of us there is no better feeling on Earth. Want to feel like a celebrity for a day? Leave the house with your dog waiting for you and see how he reacts to you when you finally come home. Bliss!

Nobody loves you like a rescued animals so why do I feel so much pain? The first to go is always our beloved fur creatures because in all truth and honesty what do they add to the aesthetics and show? Aren’t they just a nuisance always getting in the way? At least that is the grumbles that I hear with all the people having their final say.

What breaks me is knowing that we obtained all these creatures at the height of a pandemic just so we didn’t feel alone and now that we are getting back to normal they are the first things that we throw away. Our shelters are maxed out and over capacity which leads the animals that are unwanted and going to be abandoned left to survive outside in the elements all by themselves, scared and incredibly alone.

Who wants to be alone to spend out the last of their days. Imagine a life that was first spent on couches now you are forced to live out your best lives inside of a cage. That cage would be so frightening as you wait for a smile or even a tender loving hand. I think this is what makes it so hard to believe that I am human because they engage in all these things that I will never understand.

The pain that we inflict on each other brings me to my knees but I have to dig down deep inside me and find the strength to live another day. The less fortunate need my strength to pull through what is happening and give them the light they need to see this through. Love, life and laughter shouldn’t be an unforeseen commodity when only the best would ever do. I feel like I am constantly looking in from the outside wondering if anybody on the inside can see me too.

What makes us human is the very thing that tears me apart. I can’t believe what some are ok with doing knowing the hurt and pain that they inflict onto others. That mentality that they always need to get one over on each other is my breaking point and I will get up every time and leave the room.


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