“Blow your brains out. Eat all the pills.” Your life is worthless to all those around you. Do us all a favour and say goodbye. These words have always been a part of my life in some shape or form. I am tired of those around me trying to impose their wishes that involves me paying the ultimate price. I remember trying to kill myself at 13 when I found out my boyfriend at the time was sleeping with his cousin.
There is so much more to the world problems and it is a constant display of their perverse entitlement when the words of enlightenment are always followed by, “as instructed by the Queen’s bench.” With the allegations of the Monarch and their blatant disregard for any being with even an ounce of melanin one can easily believe that it was she that ordered the execution of all the Indigenous here on KKKanada’s soil. You throw away your grandchild because of “mixed blood” so I will never believe that you value the life of anything that is not connected to your blood line.
My husband says I am too gullible and I fall too easily listening to other people’s tales. He tells me I care too much about our Indigenous communities and that I watch too much true crime. What happens to my soul when the two World’s intertwine? To RoyLynn and Marlene I will find a way to start making things right. You are still Warriors out there just for now you are out of site.
Something inside snaps in every one of us that has every dealt with any sort of pain stemming from abuse. I guess that is what makes us become victimized. Easy targets being roomed for the next sick twisted freak. The more negativity that we find ourselves wrapped up in the more useless we become. Useless…
Our misguided source of self entitlement has corrupted us to our soul. Somewhere on the time line we decided that profit over life is the be all end all to this game of life. We sit atop our perch dictating to those below. The game that we got caught up in was no more than…
I am a functioning empath. My whole insides can be ripped into shreds but there is always a time and place. I usually like to cry alone because I don’t want to upset anybody else. Maybe because it is in that pain that I know came great love. In the memory of my friend who lost his way I want to reach out to those that are at their lowest. Yes I don’t know you. But I do love you. We get to walk and live this great Earth at the same sliver in time. I don’t want to make your journey harder I want to make it better. I want to inspire you to find the way to live your greatest life possible. That no matter who you are you are worth it even in those moments of greatest despair.
Not too many of us want to attract negative energy or attention. So if I can draw out those people who think our weight, our height, our race, our sexual preference is a means to discard us from being treated with manners then my life’s purpose is unfolding as it should. My goal has always been to try and stop those from being hurt and enduring any pain and suffering.
The reality is a majority of us will spend our whole lives waiting to find the one who can bare the weight of our souls. Hopefully though more of us will feel safety in being who we were born to be instead of becoming the monster society creates.
Of course my literary journey took me down the road of “The Lost Dogs”. You know the storey about Mike Vick’s dog fighting around. I have a lot of nervous apprehension reading this. To me animals are on the same level grounds as any inhabitant of the Earth. I get we think we are superior…
Maybe I did. Maybe I moved blindly into a World that I was never prepared for. Maybe it is just another blip in the life of me. I want to cry but somehow I feel like I have been set free. That noose that was tightening around my neck was now gone. The only thing left to share was my honest truth and the blind faith that I had going forward.