Universe are you listening, It’s me Ruby.

No matter which way you look at it the only control we have over our destiny is the energy it takes to get there. We can’t control the future much in the same we can’t alter the past. Live for today, forget tomorrow and live like yesterday was a dream.

The Experience of Living or Infinite Sorrow

So if living is not about the definition but about the experience does that mean that we are all missing the point? To enjoy life and all it’s candor while accepting the ebbs and flows as they come. I imagine infinite sorrow and the feeling of heartbreak. The only true cure is no cure at all. That you can only move forward with the grief in your heart but a new song on your lips.

The Mask that I Wear

The reality is you are always going to be somebody’s fuel to their own dumpster fire. Misery loves company and it is easiest to prey on another’s insecurities then to acknowledge your own. What do we talk most about? The joy we remember or the pain that we endured. More of us can relate to…

Eyes Sealed Shut

For whatever reason I stayed here on this side. So I have to make a difference. I have to make it count because if I don’t. Then the wrong life was spared that day and I can not live with myself thinking that. I will reach for the stars and I will take you all with me because it is only with love that my eyes began to open again.

Seasonal Blues

No matter the circumstances the Winter season is the worst. In the coldest nights you comfort yourself with the warmest memories that only ease the pain for a while. When you focus back into the reality you remember the life as you remembered never existed. There used to be a time when my dad was my best friend and my grandpa was my hero.

Last Words to my Grandma

It’s not the existing in a time where you are no longer. We all know that this is the cycle that we all endure. My question is just in the wondering what happened to you. Who were you and what did your life mean to you? There is going to come a time in somebody else’s life where they are going to wonder the same about me. I wonder if there is enough recorded to appease the curiosity.

The Elephant

Suicide only truly hurts the living. At least for the one who saw it as their only way out. The suffering that they leave behind is now a noose around someboy’s else’s neck. Maybe it isn’t courageous to take that root. When you consider living in a World that can’t be satisfied no matter how selfless and hard you personally try. I am going to keep searching for a way to heal what I can.

When you Forgive

Nobody ever after a heated argument feels good. Words have been exchanged, controversial points have been made and more often than not feelings have been hurt. If this is a case then this argument will live inside of you for days and weeks ahead. You will use the basis of that argument as fuel to heat up your next. It infects everything you do until you not only forgive yourself but forgive the other party for their participation too. Your mood and energy is contagious.

Becoming Your Own Best Friend

You can never predicate your feelings or emotions on any given day. It’s like saying that everybody is going to like you. The reality of both is slim to non existent. We can’t always be on. In fact it goes against everything we are to believe that. We have to experience failure and pain in…

When Your Father Hates You

We aren’t bad people. You loved us once. Now I will tell you the last peace that crushes my soul and hopefully I can experience some release.