There is something to be said for learning to adjust to what society has deemed a necessity for us. With cell phones attached to our hips we answer to everybody and we forget who it is we actually wanted to become. I can remember countless outings with people just to watch them on their phone. Oh this text is important to me. Let me take this call. Nah, I am good. I think I am better off at home.
Everyday is a struggle to get out of bed for when I do there is a lifetime of activities and feelings that I don’t have a lot of time to get through. The only thing I truly dream of becoming is that girl that almost 50 years ago I was brought into this life to be. My birthday is soon approaching with 43 turns around this fireball we call a sun, I am nowhere closer to having any of the answers that somebody tried to teach me long ago. I think what we forget in our arrogance is there are those in our wake who are just trying to get us to take a break and slow down. Take time to plant those seeds and grow those flowers because that is truly the essence of what a life well lived should mean.
I still get shamed for all the air I can’t breath and I am entirely unsure what I ever did to deserve all this. Am I hated or just confused? How would I ever know? I know that he has never said anything nice to me and we have been married 5 years. He says I am a terrible mother and an even worse wife. There are no words he hasn’t spewed at me.
You can’t win if you don’t play and you can’t have fun if you refuse to play. Be the reason why ONE person smiles today and all those who fade to grey who say you get on their nerves. You don’t need them. Why would you? We are beautiful just because. Another day above ground to dance with the living. I will light a bowl to that just because!!! Put yourself out there. Give life a try. Cuz you know sooner or later my love, wouldn’t you know it we are all just waiting to die.
You disrespect yourself every time you chose to ignore somebody else’s bad behaviour. Let that sink in.
Wouldn’t you know that most things aren’t as they seem. The greatest love of our lives should be the reflection we see in the mirror and not what others whisper to us. It’s up to us how we feel.
When you are confident in your existence and where you are heading you don’t deplete your energy willy nilly you do so with full intention you do it slow and steady. We all want to build an empire but we don’t want to put in the work. For most nothing comes easy except life, death and taxes that is who most of us allowed our summary to read. I dare to outstretch my mind and dreams as far as they can span and I will do so accordingly. It isn’t a race and no one will win so use your time wisely and say no when you can.
Somedays the toughest thing we can do is get out of bed. Our bodies are sore, our minds exhausted who has time or the energy to indulge in self care or vanity? Taking care of the only body we will ever know has nothing to do about vanity and ego’s but everything to do with how we perceive ourselves and the lifes we want to live. “Fake it to you make it!” Or “Dress for the life you want.”
What bothers me about being authentic is the judgemental eyes. The sideway glances and side eyes do nothing to disguise their feelings. Who doesn’t like to admire their own reflection? Perfectly paired outfits with coiffed hair and a winged eye. I think that is what makes me love the vintage era. Without mainstream media and accessibility more time was spent attending to self and family.
It is in that simplicity in knowing that I am in fact part of a bigger picture. We all are. For no reason we find ourselves living at the same time bound by our place in eternity. This moment will soon be forgotten with nobody left to bring it back to life. That is so powerful in itself to think about.