Reflections in time are like song of the future. You are never to sure of their existence. You want to believe in all that there is. All that is possible and all that can be. That is the beauty and mystery of life isn’t it? To go to your natural limitations then try to push through. Don’t you want to exceed on the person you were from yesterday or do you just want to do what some have before you and just let the natural course of life slide through your fingers. There is no time like the present. You will never be younger more youthful then you are in this moment.
I am far from perfect but I have learn to forgive myself. I try to remind myself to be kind as many times as a find a new grey hair (trust me that is a lot). Let’s replace our own toxic thoughts with a harmony that will be remembered throughout time. It doesn’t have to reach the masses of epic proportions. It only needs to reach and touch you.
Sometimes the hand that feeds you is the same one that you bite. It is ok to make this simple kind of transgressions. As long as you realize that once made sometimes you never get the chance to heal that wound. Some marks will always remain no matter how much sand passes through the hour glass.
You can have fake pets, a fake girlfriend and a fake life. You never have to live your life on your own merrits because you can just steal or borrow from the one beside you. We are already dead trying to fit into a life that we have long outgrown. How can we journey into the unknown when we have fear just leaving out our front door.
My husband has been clean for 5 years. The friends that he was closest with growing up are still struggling. We all know how hard it is to give up on our childhood friends especially when you have lived that sort of lifestyle together. It is incredibly odd to listen to him and his friend talk about those they grew up with, those that still use and those that have either died or have found themselves back in jail.
The feeling of never amounting to anything now became her centre. If her parents were embarassed of who she was then she should be too. Destined to never hold her chin up she was determined to not let them see what they did to her. It was the only satisfaction she got. Be hard enough so they don’t know how badly cracked you truly are. Believe and trust nobody, including herself.
We can withstand losing body parts, limbs, eyes etc but it is the physical pain that endures that we can’t live with. Pain drives as crazy. It takes our ability away from having any sort of free thought. Physical pain will make you lash out at anybody for whatever reason but it still doesn’t make you feel any better. In fact it makes you feel worse. The embarassment of not being able to control your emotions takes over like wildfire
In some way I thought by learning all that I could it would leave me more knowledgeable and aware of those people that surround us. Maybe that was part of the problem. Instead of reading about serial killers such as Jeffrey Dahmer and Ted Bundy I should have been reading about the real heros of our time and not the ones that terrified our nation.
As my boys slept I happened apon this movie on Netflix, “Life Itself”. I have never heard of it and such is life when you rely on Netflix I thought I had seen or knew of what was on their playlist. The movie is a narrative that tells the storey from each individuals perspective and…
When everything is truly all said and done I do know that I am really blessed. It is still hard to accept this wonderful life that I had spent forever wishing for. You do truly become your own worst enemy at times and its only for those times leading up that you established a connection…