Evil Is As Evil Does

Evil does as evil wishes and I am so thankful that you have allowed yourself to be exposed. The monster you see comes from your own reflection because it is in others that it becomes all that you see. Stealing. Sin. Adultery. Sin. Greed. Sin. Jealousy. Sin. That is all that is possible to reflect from your eyes. My blood runs cold when the realization sinks in that more people like you exist and is in that feeling for hope that I can never let go. To steal from the poor just so you can be rich I can’t think of no greater sin. One day when all the sticky icky has cleared my friend I hope you have found some compassion in some of my words. Doing the right thing is impossible these days and so is it to be a good friend.

Coming to Terms

It’s hard to come to terms with the reality that the love of your life is not somebody I am meant to be with. For what he chose to do in life a mother could never forgive. I think about all the lives he changed that day and the ones he took away. My heart forever in limbo as I paid the ultimate price.

Filled With Dread

This is my worst nightmare but where does one even begin to try to pack up a life to leave. His yells just echo inside my head. They are making me crazy. Making feel nothing but dread.

Forever Hated

If I do engage in such behaviour would that justify behaviour that could retiliate or worse. I sheltered myself from bad energy because it has come far too much. To be forever hated or loved by just one. I think I know the answer but I am not entirely sure. I will relinquish over my faith and begin working the room. All I have ever come to know I have taught myself. Who needs to love another when I can forever love myself.

Our Worst Image

I embrace being a woman because I love who I am and everything else in the middle that makes me me. It does take a minute or two to get on the right track but when it all begins to happen don’t you ever look back! Maybe to self reflect or to remind you how far you have gone but it is only for a quick visit don’t take up residency and stay indefinetly. A lot can happen in a day and a lot can’t happen too.

Love to Hate

I hate my life so much that I can’t see past anything else. I miss the touch of somebody who loves you and those hugs that just make all your pieces melt back together. I am so tired of those who claim that they will be there cheering for you but they are the first to leave when things go south. My life has been permanently pointed south since the day I died now I wonder why I even bothered coming back.

Just Hold On

I try. I do try but some days I just feel tired, alone and more confused. I want to connect with somebody, anybody I even see true love and connections occuring among my pets. What would it feel like to be hugged by somebody who loved me or to press my lips up against another. My body craves physical intimacy and affection I don’t want to carry this feeling of not knowing back to my grave. What I would give to be woken by the rays of the morning sun lovingly wraped in my lovers embrace.

Eyes Open, Heart Closed

I am tired, so tired of having to listen to all the things he hates about me and in all the ways he tells me I fail. To have to listen to his self righteous tirade again just makes me want to put a bullet in my eye. I am not a loser with a family that has come from nothing. Our love was never conditional or could be bought with dollar and cents. One day I will be brave enough to finally walk away or take my own life. In the absence of human love I look towards my animals to save me. They are my true salvation.

Domesticated Violence

We witnessed the horrors of the lies he told her and the fact that we couldn’t stop her from walking into her doom. This is real life and real babies were lost. They cried for their Daddy as they took their last breath. I wonder if they would have held onto each other as they suffocated and died. Their poor mother in the dirt below them at the hands of their father the hero.

Who Am I?

So who am I? I am just a mom of an incredible little being that I couldn’t imagine having to live through these horrors like so many children on Earth seemed to have experienced. I am tired of living in a world where we can excuse bad behaviour away. I will not sit here and take it anymore what would be the point in being able to stand up and shout anyways!! CAN YOU HEAR ME OUT THERE BECAUSE I CAN HEAR YOU!!! I wont let the bad man take you, come grab a hug and get warm. I promise we can get through this together.