I keep to myself for the most part because what other beings are capable of has broken my heart and left me feeling depraived. When forced to witness what others will do just to get ahead makes me thankful in this moment that I am told to eat sh*t instead. Yes it hurts to constantly get belittled inside these 4 walls and house but at least I know where the attacks are coming from and I could never say the same about anybody else.
Silenced. After a day of chaos trying to get a mi use so I can hear my inner child is driving me insane. Believing I have a partner in life who would actually like to succeed instead of driving me into an early grave. What I noticed about the meticulous way he dominants my daily life that I am incapable of having any sort of friends. I am weird. Chronically misunderstood and my mind is getting pushed to the limits and I am officially insane.
Sure it’s hard and I get distracted but I always take a deep breath and get myself back up! Don’t you? If you could? That is why I keep talking so much gibberish. Just a little word vomit this cold, Saturday morning makes me wonder how it is you are doing? Do you find peace and calm in and amongst the day or is there more chaos in every possible way? Take a deep breath and don’t forget to breath. There is peace in your own serenity that nobody could ever take away from you and nobody could ever find. Have faith in your truth and knowing who you are. One day you will be returned you were destined to be a star.
Decades of being the victim I still play the part even though the reality of it is all that was a lifetime ago. I don’t know any other way than to play the part. What would that mean to me if all that abuse never happened? If I never played the part of the victim and found a way to honor the child I was before it all got blown out of proportion and I was made out to feel some sort of way. Never destined to be good enough or even invited out to play I was born to be a loner. A loner in abundance what it means to be alive. I feel comfort amongst the inadequate life that finds a way to embrace me in such a way that man could never.
No sense. No sound. No real way of being just a misconstrued notion of how to be and what makes sense. Isn’t that the goal of what to strive towards just a new way of being that was socially acceptable no more confusing than what it used to mean to be me or you. Or maybe somebody else. Somebody else less frowned to be. Somebody made up of love instead on contentious misguided hate. I hope for a better, more understanding existence that is not only better for you but for also me.
What the world needs now is love, compassion and just a basic comprehension of the human experience. Plain and simple we all want to fit in that it hurts us immensely when it’s not reciprocated back.
You can’t win for trying when you fail to see eye to eye. Well not eye to eye. I dare you to look in deep. The eyes are the windows to the soul if you believe that and me. I also believed that like I believed in our souls. So much can be learned in their depths and remind us what it is that we can lose if we continue to play the game this way.
The right team is crucial in anything in life that we do and that includes all different types of the family dynamic. Remember if you are doing the right thing in life you will never feel like you are working. Being kind to the hand that feeds you is harder to do with sore cuticles and ragged nails believe you me. After all these years I still remember both of my Grandmother’s hard working hands and how I wish I could hold them just for one moment more. If only I knew the grace that comes when being kind and how I wish we would all do something more.
Wouldn’t you know that most things aren’t as they seem. The greatest love of our lives should be the reflection we see in the mirror and not what others whisper to us. It’s up to us how we feel.
By investing in me we share the same dream so of course I am investing in you too. Heck! I always promised if I started a Girl Gang that there would be jackets and so there shall be. As a thank you for joining the team and the vision a personalized “Beauty with Besties” jackets is my gift to you. Along with a trinket or two. This is our sisterhood, our vision, our team and together we can move mountains that started when we dared to dream.