There has to be a purpose a reason that can only be seen once we are finally knocking on that door so why be an *sshole here and now and make it incredibly impossible for others to live and breathe. When I begin to attract the light of the entities that once was and that I hope to find once more blessings happen. Small ones. Ones that only a heart that is truly open can finally feel and understand. When you see those blessings arise in a seemingly impossible day you get inspired. You get all the feels and you finally begin to feel good. All the hard work and determination starts paying off in small ways and you know that it is the love that you have found in others that is the drive in everything behind. Without their purpose and their will and their insight into every day I don’t think I could find a purpose or even a will to stay.
Think of the girl we were born to be, before the world got to cold and took our smile away. There had to be a way to set aside those that understood my journey and to them I didn’t need to keep explaining. They didn’t roll their eyes and say, “OMG not another MLM vomit”, no my VIP’s greeted me with open arms and I could hear their cheer even when I had shut the blinds and pulled the blanket over my eyes and begged for the darkness of night to take my cheer away. These women came and celebrated my victories and heard my cries and said let’s host another Nail Bar, let’s do what you love doing, let’s celebrate beauty and sisterhood and all the things that you stand for and all the things that you were born to do.
The users of the world should have their time but for now we are just waiting for the tides to turn. Ethics seem to be more of a passing fancy. Not too many are willing to engage. What is good for one may not be good for another yet we are all intertwined in this most incestuous way. Did you hear what so and so did with so and so? No. I have no l idea what it is you are trying to say. Or who it is you are talking about. Life isn’t like that now. We know everybody’s business. Our access to social media ensures us of that. Yap, Yap but don’t clap back because if you have a difference of an opinion there will be an army of fools ready to lynch you and hang you out to dry. There is nothing more powerful than trolls in big numbers. Trolls get their power from being heard and unseen.
Did you know that approximately 80 % of premature aging is caused by the sun? That warm golden globe promising us life as it carefully speeds up the hands of father time. We all know that there are certain activities that some engage in that will increase the affects of the sun. Some of these external factors would include UV exposure, sunlamps, environmental exposure, environment, poor skin care maintenance, misuse of products, allergies and reactions and photo sensitivity.
Our lives are intertwined and then we become nothing for no reason? No something is at work much deeper here and it sucks all the more because I can feel it. Every fiber of my being begins to stand on edge and take notice. Are we as a race that heartless? is the almighty dollar really that more important? Than human life and love and freedom and laughter. We snuff it all without caring. We do it all without thinking. We don’t care who that somebody is that we are squashing underneath our feet. As long as it is not somebody we care about right? but what about if it were me?
Some die together. Most die alone. Does that change the value of our story or the way that it gets told? Everything happens for a reason. This, that and the other thing. Don’t you want to feel what it feels like to be happy? Don’t you want to know what it feels like when your heart begins to sing? Dreams are dreams for a reason till reality snaps back. It reminds us of our higher purpose bringing to us peace and happiness, oh how I like that sound of that ring.
I am not here to swindle anybody just to empower you in your life. I don’t want to shine alone in my journey I want to have you all shine too. My dream is to have a sorority for middle aged women where we can all come together and have a safe place. My dreams don’t come true until we are all safe preferably alone on our Island living our dreams.
My life I know was given to me by chance but inside me is something powerful begging to learn that last dance. It is not enough for me to walk happily alone so my energy begins to shift and search for another who is hurting. The discontent of another can be felt by so many; however we are too concerned with popularity to stand outside the sidelines and pick up the broken, fallen and unsteady. Once I see you for who you truly are I have no problem pouring the gasoline. You see I know you are capable of setting off that fatal spark. It is why I sit here alone waiting for others in the dark.
I miss good people. I miss being pregnant too but like the ways of passage everything seems to dissolve into nothing at least common decency was the first to go. It is hard for me to feel accepted in the land of sabre tooth smiles and shark bites. I only played the game out of fear of what would happen to me not because it was something I wanted to be or do.
I don’t know how certain books make their way onto my lap but once again I sit here in a pivotal, “Holy Shit” moment. The book is called the The Truth and the author is Neil Strauss he also wrote the New York Times Bestselling Author, The Game. You remember The Game don’t you? Made…