Oh Christmas

Another Christmas has come along as well as the expectations that go with. The stress of the holidays was not good for me. It actually had a direct impact on my ability to produce milk. So annoying as producing milk is important to me especially because he was premature. I just saw on the news…

Dilemma

Oh Christmas the time for cheer, giving and family. Why is there always so much pressure around this time of year. The hardest thing for me is the idea that people can walk all over you, treat you poorly and call you names but as soon as Dec 25 comes along its supposed to be…

Tearing down walls

I have gone through so much in my life. Outside of high school I rarely had a close friend. I am not to sure why but I found it incredibly hard to even trust females. I was in an abusive relationship when I was 13. I learned to lie to cover up the bruises, I…

Married Life

As some of you know I just met my husband November 13, 2016, married on May 13, 2017 and had our son on October 16, 2017. I wanted a different type of relationship. Normally I gravitate towards men who were verbally abusive, attached to other women or for every purpose not marriage material. It was…

Three Hours

It’s amazing what you learn to fit into three hours and how your life revolves around the simplicity of those hours. A nice relaxing set of 3 hours looks like this: baby starts crying. You pick him up, change, feed, burp, rock to sleep lay down, pump, sit down only to repeat it all again….

Lost myself

Days and nights all blended into one. I had no idea where, who or why I was. I couldn’t believe this was happening. I hugged my belly trying to understand what/why this was happening. I was becoming driven by fear. I was scared if I fully loved my husband he would get ripped away from…