Authenticity

I bounce around the four corners of my mind until there is nothing left of me. People speak of authenticity but truly have no idea what that means. Is it authentic for you to preach to the masses against child abuse, slave labor and even the sex trade by your continuation of purchases that you deem worthy enough for you that back handedly fund all this and more. You may think that we got here organically but truth be told we were nudged along this whole time. Good people don’t want innocent blood spilled no mater what side of the fence you are on. Compassion doesn’t work that way and life is supposed to love and heal. Imagine living back then only to find out that humans are even more grotesque than they have ever been before. We are stuck in this loop of working our fingers to the bone to fund our terrorists who are here right now dancing and laughing on holy soil with our brothers and sisters being the meal that replenishes the Earth. You have to change everything you have ever done before and stand tall in your own pile of sh*t. Are you truly authentic or are you living a life on display for others to appreciate and understand?

All you need to do is reach one and you can say your time on here was a success. If your heart can feel the pains of another and their pain resonates and hits your core you maybe on the right track. Living blindly into oblivion collecting along the way when it comes time to meet with your maker he can’t see you underneath all that junk. Life should never be worth more than a tangible asset yet here on Earth we believe the opposite to be true. In hindsight I wish I never blew a gasket and killed my wife and kids, or I have no idea what came over me it was like I was possessed. No accountability for the actions of the body over the soul. Why do we allow those to take from us in the most finite ways and all we ever do is slap them on the hands. The Pope announced he was sad for the find in Canada. Sad? YOUR brotherhood raped, starved and beat innocent children for your God because YOU yourself refused to understand. As a brother of the cloth you need to stand upright in this filth and bathe of the sins of your brothers. You follow the same faith. You engage in the same acts. Do you not seek forgiveness for the crimes of your brothers because that would in fact admit the sainthood’s guilt? A man who leads others to engage in these demonic acts against children is a sadist. Children have always been revered as the ultimate sacrifice and here they were engaging in this sin right here on our soil. If you don’t apologize for your God then the only human answer seems to get the apology we seek through violence and war. Isn’t that what we have always done? Isn’t that what we have already perfected. I say through the Pope and the Queen to the wolves and get on with it. I include the Queen because it was her face up on the schools of the walls of those children smiling down on them as they took their last breaths. Of course I am sad and I am angry. If these were white children all this would have happened and more.

How many people refuse to take a stance because they are scared of losing followers or respect? Let me tell you as I thought about this myself. Those people that you are scared of are those people who do the most damage. Speak your truth and let it flow and let the right energies be able to find you. You can hide away and say nothing or do something and maybe a trend will occur. We are conditioned to believe that it will take nothing and nobody can do anything to change just that but if enough people use their voices we can find each other and there is safety in numbers we are all aware of that. Life doesn’t last forever but what are you doing to try and get ahead. A dead end job is still a dead end job paying for another’s vacations and their children’s schools. The whole system was designed to keep all of us suppressed but it so much worse for anybody who appears to be a little different. So many of our children get diagnosed early with ADHD or Autism at growing rates. Who is the one profiting off the medication? Me, you, them? It destroys our children taking away their pride and futures. Nobody wants to be that person who is medicated the stigma that surrounds that title is too huge. People always judge you when you tell them that you are. OH!!! You are crazy! And then that becomes the center of all fights. People suffer from Mental Disorders prefer to do so alone. We already have a hard time putting ourselves out there, it is just easier not to say anything at all.

I bare everything that I am because I don’t want to get close to someone and have them find out something about me and cut me off and run away. I am an abuse survivor. I have been raped multiple times on different occasions throughout my life. The last attack left me in the hospital. I know what it feels like to sit in the dark staring at the stars asking for the angels to come get you while you sleep so you don’t have to open your eyes. I know how it feels to hold onto your dead’s friends hand and beg him to come alive. There is so much pain and sorrow that we keep all bottled up. We are scared that if only they knew the truth about us they would too throw us away. When you have had people turn their back on you for no reason at all it begins to make you hard. Your back gets arched and you vow that it will never happen like that again. You decide not to share or engage in the stories of your life. Hell you are just sitting there waiting for life to pass you by. I get it I know you and I want to be your friend. I am tired of those that say they are but when push comes to shove where are they and when did they go?

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